Well now - great start to the new year. My 2.5 year marriage and ten years of a relationship is down the drain tonight. DH is sleeping in the spare room and announced that he 'cant take it anymore' - he wants to leave me and our 2 beautiful kids!!!!
he is blaming me of course, just coz I'm a stupid cow and a nag and he only married me & had kids with me coz he was trying to make me happy, but then said that he has been unhappy since I concieved our first child - almost 7 years ago!!! I mean - how do f**k am I to take that??

Of course, I'm a nag because I let it out how I'm feeling when I'm upset about something - but then its out there, I deal with it and then carry on - he has been LYING to me for almost 7 F-ing YEARS!!! WTF!!!!
I knew something was wrong with him a few months ago, but he made me feel like I'm loosing the plot - but hey, the truth is out there now!!

I'm so upset, I dont know what to think or fwwl - my DS & DD will be so upset if he's not here - they miss him when he's not home in the evenings before they go to bed - how will I handle having to tell them that they'll only see him 2 days a week!!??

The stupid effer doest know how brilliant I am a a wife and mother, but he'll get a kick up the jacksy when we seperate, I will not be as soft as his ex wife - oh no, I will not accept a monday evening taking the kids - oh no , he'll have them all weekend every weekend. I've worked my arse off to create a happy home for us, and now he's turned around tonight and saya that he doesnt feel like this is his home??? We've been here 7 effing years!!!! I could kill him - if he tears us apart due to stresses of this recession - well then he an effing w**ker!!!! I'm so annoyed with him! He is saying throuwing in about my 6 year business going down the drain, he hasnt mentioned that he has been out of work for 3 years and I struggled on my own, to try and keep the business going, and not stress him out about it - seemingly, I'm selfish to do that!! I'm a nag tonight coz he went ofr a pint at 3pm and didnt return until 10.30 pm to celebrate new years with me - he thinks I should be delighted he came home in time for NY - not upset, so now he decides its time he leaves!!!!
He's calling me selfish and bad with money - I dont get any dole for myself, he collects it all, any cash I have I put back into the house!!! I bought myself a necklace for my 4oth birthday, (coz I know he wouldnt get it for me) - it was expensive, but I've saved up for over 6 months for it and I dont smoke and hardly go out at all!! - but he smokes and 'deserves' a pint or two and bought a 46" TV last year and says that he is different as that was on HP???? I mean WTF??? he is in la la land, but because I suffer from depression, I'm the looney bin!!! It's taking all my strenght to not take the kids and run run run!!!!
He's mad at me for wanting to go to the USA for my nieces wedding in May - one of my brothers has given me 500 euro towards it, I know I can get another few quid from dad and I'll do carboot sales and markets to raise the rest, plus I'm being put up by the father of the bride and they'll give me a car to get around - and he's calling me selfish?? AllI want is something to look forward to in this doom & gloom - we havnt had a holiday since our honeymon in 2009. bur sure, I'm such a stupid thick blond bioth of a wife, he just wants to walk out on it all - and BLAME for it all - he even said - ' before I met you I was never in debt' - well, I had my own house and car - he had a car and was living with his mum at 36 years of age!!!! Who is the better person???

Sorry - I'm just sooooo upset!!!!!

Sounds like your better off without him.

Jesus, I am so sorry to hear he has started out your new year making you feel bad about yourself.

I agree with other poster, it sounds like you are better off without him. He clearly doesn't appreciate you or your kids. Selfish selfish man.

I am angry on your behalf. You and your kids deserve better than that kind of sh*te.

Wow what a post?? I really hope you're ok hun I notice you posted in the early hours when things were very raw? Obviously there's been a huge blow up but I would never dare say youre better off without him just yet as you have been together 7 years and have 2 beautiful children. I would assume there was alcohol consumed last night and hopefully todat you two can sit down and talk about things rationally before maki f a huge decision. Will be thinking about you today babe

My immediate reaction to your post is, if you speak to your husband the way you wrote that post, then it's no surprise to me that you're having difficulty.

I hope you can communicate well and come to a resolution that you're happy with together.

Best of luck, whatever happens.

Hi Layla14,

Hope you are ok. Obviously you were really upset and angry last night - I would be too. I hope things were a little better today. Can anything be done to make things better? Councilling for example?

I agree that it's too early for any of us to say you would be better off without him - that's something you know yourself or will discover if that's the case.

Hope things work out for you and you have somebody to talk to.

Really sorry to hear this, stay stronge, stay focused, don't use the children as pawns, you both created them, it's both your job to raise them whether you are with each other or not. Best of luck x

Finicky Fi wrote:My immediate reaction to your post is, if you speak to your husband the way you wrote that post, then it's no surprise to me that you're having difficulty.

Harsh there, surely the OP is allowed to express and vent her anger when she is only told a few hours before that her husband was leaving her? I know I wouldn't be fully composed in writing a post if the father of my children dropped that bombshell.

OP I hope things are clearer now, have you talked? Is it still a separation that your husband wants?

I agree completely with Mrs BMW, do not allow your children to become pawns here, it is not there fault.

I hope that you have better news for us.

bazinga wrote:

Finicky Fi wrote:My immediate reaction to your post is, if you speak to your husband the way you wrote that post, then it's no surprise to me that you're having difficulty.

Harsh there, surely the OP is allowed to express and vent her anger when she is only told a few hours before that her husband was leaving her? I know I wouldn't be fully composed in writing a post if the father of my children dropped that bombshell.

OP I hope things are clearer now, have you talked? Is it still a separation that your husband wants?

I agree completely with Mrs BMW, do not allow your children to become pawns here, it is not there fault.

I hope that you have better news for us.

Totally agree with Bazinga, jeez FIniky Fi, any compassion in there???

OP, you poor poor thing, I cannot begin to imagine what you're going through, I really hope things get sorted for you, I wish had something insightful to say but I just really really feel so bad for you, good luck hun xx

Thanks for all your support - he back tracked the next morning and was all over me all day. He hasnt said sorry, but he trying his best to make it up to me. I've come down with the worst cold ever since I never slept a wink all NYE. - he is being kind to me, which is all I've ever asked from him. Other times if I'm sick he lets the kids run riot and wreck the place, but today he's been tyding up and bringing me teas in bed etc. It's the simple things I ask for but in his eyes I'm a nag!
Anyway, we've decided to start again and be nicer to eachother.
Any, thanks for standing up for me too with that other harsh post - it almost made me cry, but everyone has an opinion!
Here's hoping I never have to go through that again!!!!
Happy new year -