Oh God that is so terribly sad.

Well he has been laid to rest, just immediate family attended. So sad to think she was so near the 24 week mark I hope she gets some answers.

Luka didnt want to read and not reply.
Im so sorry - you must feel so sad pet

This happened a few weeks ago to my SIL's neice. Very sad altogether. Baby made it through to full term, through surgery too and unfortunately she picked up an infection in the hospital. A little trooper, she was.I was in work when my mam told me. I went to the bathroom and cried. I always think of her when I get the mammy blues and realise that I have the best gift of all and I shouldn't complain.

To all the angel babies, we are thinking of you even though we never knew you

Thanks MrsDarcy,

I'm so sorry about your SIL's niece. That must have been very difficult. I know the tone of this thread is morbid, but sadly it's something that happens & sometimes talking about it helps. I know women that have lost babies in every trimester now. Most commonly, like myself, the first trimester, but also the second & third. My first 2 pregnancies, I just "knew". Even though I had scans & saw little heartbeats, at follow up scans they had stopped. A very good friend of mine was 26, on her 2nd pregnancy, when the movements stopped at 18 weeks. 5 years on, she can't bring herself to visit his grave, she said she just can't do it.
I don't want to be too downbeat, as we know most pregnancies go to term. But sometimes it's just helpful to bear in mind that a small percentage don't. No-one wants to think of that, even when I got pregnant first, it never enter my head, until it was staring me in the face. BUt at least I was early enough to be spared the burial of a baby, I can't even imagine how horrendous that was for my SIL'S friend.

Luka you sound so strong.

I've never been through a mc or sb. Hearing about my SIL's niece was only the second time I'd heard about someone losing their baby. A dear friend of mine had to give birth to her stillborn daughter 2 years ago. It was the most heartbreaking time.

I see you have a DS though, and he must really ease your pain, though I know it will never fully go away.

Hi MrsDarcy,

Yes i have a DS now, he's a great little boy & is bringing joy to so many. I know early miscarriage is quite common, but what I found the hardest thing to cope with was they were so close together & I was nearly 35, so I took it all very badly. I honestly thought I had left it all too late. But thankfully it was 3rd time lucky I was a bag of nerves for the whole pregnancy & now that my DS is 10 months, we are thinking about no 2, as I'm 37 now. I just don't know how I am going to face it! We'll just have to take the chance.

Luka - got that is a heartbreaking story.

I had my first at 39 and if/when we go for #2 I will be 41. Like you I think age isn't on my side and had some tests on the first one to make sure all would be ok. Despite the tests I worried all the way through as a couple of my friends have disabled children even when their pregnancies were trouble free and the disabilities couldn't be detected before birth.

Hi Cinnabon,

Yes pregnancy can be such a minefield. IN one way I think age doesn't matter in that, 2 friends of mine who lost babies in the second trimester, were in their 20's. On the other hand, I know a woman, who's nearly due her first baby, & she's 48! She got married at 34 & after years of it "not happening", they gave up. She was, I must say, VERY surprised she got pregnant at 47, but everything is fine, she had the anamoly scan, there appeared to be no reason for concern & things look good.

In one way, I was lucky in that, I was getting pregnant quite quickly, but then something was going wrong. BUt thankfully with DS all was good. Fingers crossed for you too with no 2. I probably won't breathe for 9 months again, but I coped last time! Good luck &

Hi Girls, just wanted to update on my SIL's friend, she is doing ok, nearly 2 months after losing her little boy at 23 weeks pregnant. She did get some info from the hospital in relation to the post mortem, & my SIL said she was happy enough with the reasons, (I don't know specifics) but it was apparent something caused the amniotic sac to rupture so early (at 22 weeks) & she knew it was nothing that could be prevented & nothing that she herself had done. SO at least she had a small amount of peace of mind. My SIL said she is doing very well in the light of all this. THank God she's doing ok now, as she was in a very bad way when it happened in february. Just said I'd update.

Luka - thanks for the update. I guess seeing as she has an explanation rather than 'it was just one of those things' may make it easier to get some closure.