Brides – do you ever feel like you’re the only ones with a massive to-do list – while the groom simply has to turn up on the day? We’ve already mentioned this in our wedding prep lament, where we explained how no groom has ever uttered the words ‘today, I start my three-month beauty countdown’, among other things. Well, today we’re turning the tables. Here’s what the groom needs to remember – and the sooner he knows it, the better!
Ask the bride if you can be of any help
And we don’t mean just once! Here’s a tip that’ll serve you well not only today, but for the happily ever-after: when a woman says ‘I don’t need any help’, she only means ‘at this time’. She definitely doesn’t mean ‘until the end of my natural life’. So unless she actually specifies she never, ever, ever wants you to do anything for the wedding, except to say ‘I do’ when prompted, you’re not off the hook. Ask if you can help on a regular basis.
Give her an unforgettable gift
It doesn’t have to be lavish and put you in debt for 10 years – it just has to come from the heart. If you’ve never written her a love letter, write one to be read on the morning of the wedding day. Think of something she’s pined for, but not bought for herself. Or if you’re really stuck for ideas, speak to her mum, best friend, chief bridesmaid or sister. Believe us, she’ll cherish this gift forever. Plus, she’s probably already bought you something.
Get the gifts for your groomsmen
She’s got her girls, you sort out the guys. Don’t leave this to the bride, she’s got enough on her plate. The guys are your crew – so take responsibility for buying their gifts. If it’s going to be a big spend, and it comes out of your joint wedding budget, just make sure you ask her if she’s ok with it. We’re sure she will be, unless you’re buying everyone a Maserati.
Get your own accessories
Even if the bride is sorting out your suits (or at least pointing you in the direction of a respectable groomswear supplier), you should sort out your own accessories. We mean things like cufflinks, bowtie, belt, shoes, socks, cravat, whatever goes with your suit. It’s time to let that dapper voice inside you speak loud and clear. And if you truly have no clue, ask the staff at the suit store or rental place – they’ll have tons of suggestions for you, guaranteed.
Photo from Philippa & Conor’s real wedding by Massafelli Photography
Writing your own vows?
Start early, and keep them nice and short. Daunted by the task? Read our simple guide to writing your own vows – you can totally do this.
Take charge of wedding-free days
Wedding planning – it only looks fun on Pinterest. In real life, it’s stress, sleepless nights, crying, arguing and having too many decisions to make. If you can’t help with anything at all (although, see point 1), the absolute LEAST you can do is give her wedding-free days. Organise a day trip to the nearest picturesque town, where you’ll wander the streets together and have lunch. Sign up to a discount site like Groupon and buy her a nice spa treatment. Cook dinner, buy wine, and put on a movie, while she puts up her feet and relaxes. You won’t believe what a huge difference this makes.
Have your stag do sooner rather than later
Stag and hen dos used to be called ‘last night of freedom’ because they originally took place the night before the wedding. Can you imagine getting completely sloshed, and then having to look fresh as a daisy the very next day? This isn’t going to happen. Tell your best man to organise the stag do well before the wedding – not even during the same week. You’ll need all the recovery time you can get, trust us.
Organise the rehearsal
Agree with her on the date, and do the rest yourself. Speak to the person officiating over your ceremony, contact the people who may need to be there (like bridesmaids and groomsmen). And you don’t even have to do it all yourself – that’s why the chief bridesmaid and best man are our sidekicks!
On the wedding day, get up on time and eat something
Nerves – they can turn any man into a quivering puppy on his own wedding day. Be sure to set the alarm and make time for breakfast. Not only will it give you the strength you’ll need for the day, it’ll stop your stomach growling at the least appropriate moments (like when it’s totally quiet in church). Don’t count on those canapés later – they’ll disappear before you have a chance to see a single tray!
And, make sure you know where the rings are
Normally, the best man is entrusted with carrying the rings to the ceremony. But before you leave the house, make extra sure they’re coming with you. Because the vows that go ‘without this ring, I thee wed’ just don’t sound right.
Photo from Grace & Karl’s real wedding by Couple Photography
