2yrs 10mths still in nappies HELP

We've Moved!

Our wonderful discussion forums have now moved to Facebook...

Click to join us in our HIGM ("Help I'm Getting Married") group!

skillet Posts: 244
My very clever,bright,articulate daughter refuses to use the potty or the toilet. I am at my wits end with her as i have put little knickers on her and she just keeps wetting them. I put her on the loo she screams as if she is being killed i try to put her on the potty and she wont bend her legs. She is a wonderful little girl and as bright as a button but she is just too big for nappies. I tried the Pull Up ones and again she treats them like a nappy. Sometimes she holds her wee for hours and i am starting to worry about it. Most people think i am mad to be so worried and tell me to leave it for another while but i did that 6 months ago and i am afraid if i go backwards with her now she will end up confused and all the tears will have been for nothing. I really would appreciate some advice from you moms out there. She is to be our flowergirl next year so it would be lovely if there were no nappies in sight. :roll:
Lucy D Posts: 91
Hello Just a though but why not try like a bigger version of a cloth nappy she might decided then when she goes she doesn't like the idea of being in her own mess especially when it gets heavy and is wet, see she is probably quite happy with the nappies God bless her as they absorb all the moisture but I am sure that having something wet and dripping it might get her motivated other than that try to make it into a game and treat her if she sees you making a big fuss over her it might help. Best of luck.
clairebear76 Posts: 568
hi skillet the way i did it was to put the potty is the main room she was using, and told my little girl a story about big clever girls who use the potty, but never ask her to use it, kept the nappy on for a couple of days... then i took the bottom half of her clothes off every time we was home, so it would be easier for her to go on, which she started to do as she got fed up with weeing on the floor, (thank god for wooden floors!) so i put her on, with her favorite toys around her, so she'd stay on for longer, and when she went for a wee we just praised the living life out of her which she always loves... also try not show it's a big deal if she doesn't go as if they feel they've dissapointed you there more likely not to what to use the potty again. hope this helps you skillet...let me know how you get on... good luck clairebear76
charli Posts: 5994
my little girl was fully trained at 2, 2 months (finished with night nappies and all, which really surprised me) what worked for me was to take a few days off work and stay at home. leave her in her knickers and potty in your living room (hope you don't have carpet) every now and then i would coax her to sit on it and read her a story, give her a drink, watch t.v, it was painstaking and loads of times she would sit for ages and not go, i often went a few hours on and off the potty and still no wee but eventually she will let go (even if by accident) on the potty and once she goes once the penny will start to drop with her. my little girl hated the toilet, but i brought her if i was going myself and after 2 weeks or so on the potty she started to go on the toilet. i am not a fan of the pull-ups either as my daughter knew she had a nappy and would wee in them so far me the old fashioned way, 1.stay at home, 2.leave her in knicks all day (it''s a bit warmer now to do this with a little t-shirt on) 3. if she protests don't force her, but coax her onto the potty with different games etc 4. once you feel she is starting to train, when you are putting a nappy on at night, put it on when she is asleep so she doesn't know she is wearing it as you could break the cycle good luck you will get there have patience! i felt after 2/3 days i was getting no where and then slowly but surely day 4 and on she was kinda grasping it as in she would go in the potty but wouldn't tell me she needed to go and after a week she had it!
skillet Posts: 244
Thank You all for your replies. I am having a problem with getting her to even sit on either the potty or the toilet but I know you are all right time and patience. I am a working mom so it is difficult as she is at home with my aunt during the week and so I dont really get the full picture and then i steamroll in at 5.30 an expect it to have all worked out. The tip about putting the nappy on asleep is brill as i was worried about her holding her wee till night and then using the nappy to its fullest. You guys are great I dont feel so useless and lets face it 8 year olds dont wear nappies so they all must have come thru this ordeal at some stage.
charli Posts: 5994
exactly Skillet, i know working full-time doesn't help that's why i did it at christmas when i was off. putting the nappy on when she is a asleep, i didn't do this until she started going for me in the potty, that way she would go at some point before bed, up to a half hour before and then id know she had an empty bladder, don't come to that stage until she at least goes for you in the potty for a few days. my little girl was great for going but i had to KEEP coaxing her and asking her, sometimes i would say do you need to make a wee and she would say no and id say lets just check and see and she would go!! remember as well loads and loads of praise (even if she does a drop!!!) i even resorted to sitting her dolly on the potty and slyly squirting some water from a bottle in to make her think the dolly went :oops: :oops: things we do!
clairebear76 Posts: 568
i did that too charli though she never fell for it!!!
charli Posts: 5994
either did mine!!!!
clairebear76 Posts: 568
bless em...
[email protected] Posts: 492
I really have no personal experience of toilet training but just watched my sister and my nephew go through the same ordeal. My nephew was about the same age as your little girl. My sister bought the Bear in the big blue house DVD where they spend the episode talking about toilet training. Its really lovely and very positive aand gentle. She also bought a storybook about a child and its teddy using the potty. The book also includes a star chart and stars for every time little one uses the potty. I think the dvd was played on a continuous loop and the book was read while he sat on the potty!! She also cut out and stuck up pics of the kandoo ads in magazines of kids siting on potties, as reinforcement. My sis bought a second potty for her little boy's favourite teddy and teddy wore a little pair of pants!!! I think it took about a week of constant day in day out reinforcement (she did during xmas holidays). Since then there has been a few hiccups when he refused to go but she bought the Kandoo products and when he saw them he couldn't get on the potty quick enough! I'm a firm believer though that attaching pressure will only make your little girl resentful and creat an emotional block. Good luck