advice about Hubbie

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dita Posts: 960
O.k Girls I;m just over three weeks pregnant..and my lovely hubbie is being very over protective He doesn't want me jogging..he doesn't want me making the bed( This is a plus) he thinks I have to sit quiet and rest all the time... He also won't have sex with me as he is not sure should he give me a orgasm and if by having sex we might knock the little bean out of place inside me... How do I put his mind at ease....I'm just continuing as normal and other than feeling tired I feel fine... We are going out this weekend and I love to dance I can just see him giving out saying I can't dance He also said we are not flying anywhere until after the baby is I hate flying and get stressed on a plane he thinks that would be bad for the baby......ahhhhhh!!! Help
Toblerone Posts: 2698
Ah it's sweet that he is looking after you so carefully however pregnancy is not an illness and unless you have medical issues it actually is better for you to keep active (within reason) and do as you have been doing and what you feel up to. Have you spoken to him about this? Is your DH a doctor? or medically trained? Maybe bringing him along to the GP surgery with you and asking all these things with GP so that he can hear from the professional what you can and cannot do might help. As regards dancing, if you are up for it do it and just ignore him. Regarding flying, they do say to try to avoid any unnecessary flying in the early stages but from about 14 wks to 26 I believe all is ok and by that stage babs will be so well cushioned that while you may get abit stressed flying, they will be all cocooned nicely in. As regards DTD, i thought my DH would have real problems with me pg but he just thinks i'm even more irresistable now i'm pg and would hop me every day if he could :o0 :o0 You have to do what you can do and not be wrapped in cotton wool or else it will be very long nine months. Congrats and take care. :wv
Emme Posts: 4735
Ah he seems really nervous. Only last night my DH was saying he doesn't know what to be doing with me and I'm 7 months on. He wants to stop me doing things but doesn't feel he has the right and there I am wondering why he isn't stopping me doing things! They can't win and as my DH said last night he's never been through this before and doesn't know where to start and stop interfering. Toblerone makes a good point. Bring him along to either the GP or OB and ask him to have a list of questions, doesn't matter how trivial. Mine was happy to answer all kinds of madness! It's lovely though, try to be patient with him!
HarmattanRose Posts: 1444
dita. It is quite sweet but I'm sure very annoying. As Toblerone has said maybe take him along to the doctor with you or even buy a few pregancy books - I have "What to expect when you are expecting" but the "Pregancy Bible" is also supposed to be really good - and let him read them. I rode horses (very high risk activity according to the books) until I was 10 weeks. Dr advised not to go beyond 10 weeks as your womb starts to move above your pelvis after this. I did my keep fit class until I was 20 weeks, flew to Lanzarote at 8 weeks (4.5 hr flight) and New York at 15 weeks despite having a bleed the week before. (Not sure where they say not to fly in early pregancy is Toblerone - my GP was perfectly fine with it). The thing is to carry on doing things while you can but be sensible with high risk activities - where you could hurt yourself & baby. (If you are flying you need to buy compression socks and my Obst. recommended a low dose asprin for NY - though not to be taken after a certain number of weeks) The thing is you need to check with your own doctor for your own circumstances for each thing that might be higher risk. I'm now 7 1/2 months, still doing all the housework - changing beds, hoovering etc and I'm even decorating the nursery with my mum (though she is doing the actual wall papering - I'm doing the pasting etc) No reason why you can't as long as you feel no adverse effects and I am planning on working up until I'm 39 weeks (provided I still feel ok). Some days I wish my DH was a bit more like yours at this stage!
madridsprog Posts: 272
Congratulations dita! I'm sorry i had to laugh at your post as my DH was the same about DTD while pregnant, so I sat him down, told him that while he was "above average size" he wasnt going to have an impact on the baby, when he persisted I turned around and said Well where do you think babies get dimples from!! :o0 :o0 That did the trick and now hes up for it nearly every night!! :eek I think its the two extra cupsizes that helped :o0 enjoy being pampered, I would love it if my DH made the bed!! and cleaned the house, he still thinks I'm superwoman who can do all the things I used to before hand, cooking, cleaning, shopping, working studying etc,etc, hes getting a bit of a shock this week as I'm too tired :o0
april10 Posts: 72
dita, i hear ya sister. my loving OH has me driven demented 'minding me!!' not to put him down, but seriously before i got pregnant, i could have pushed the car up and down the drive, without him even batting an eyelid :o0 now he wont let me lift a heavy pot!! it is lovely and im sure it will wear off. with regard the sex thing, he is exactly the same :eek all i can say is that i hear they eventually come thinking of sending him on a night out with the lads, then taking advantage when he gets back :o0 :o0 hang on in there girl. good luck