Deleted. Thanks girls.
Im so sorry you are going through this mess.
What a desperate coincidence to happen, you must feel like you have the worst luck in the world. My heart goes out to you.
Would your OH trust you enough, in that you could say " things happened " with this man and you are just not comfortable talking about it.
Maybe you will in time, but really you just need to prevent this man from coming to your wedding at all costs.
I am so sorry about what happened and I dont really know how you can not invite him without giving you OH a good reason. Are you certain you do not want to tell him what happened? But there is no way that man can be at your wedding. Could he just disappear off the list? Invite get lost in the post? I hope someone can give some better advice, this shouldnt be something you should be stressing over coming up to your wedding. Dont let it take away from your wedding
Best of luck
Id agree with the other wollies - there is no why this guy can come - wedding are a day of heightened emotions anyway and it would be difficult for you and your parents with him there.
Im not sure there is away around not asking him without you OH or maybe the guy himself getting suspicious. Maybe stress to your OH again, you really dont want many people there you are not close to / dont know very well, say you dont want to spend the day anxious about it and he might come round. Is this guy a close friend or just a friend of your OH?
Have you spoken you your parents about this?. If this is upsetting you - dont go through it alone, talk to someone who knows about the situation.
This is heartbreaking.
I am terribly sorry to hear your story.
I don't really know what to say, but one thing that stands out from me is do not let this man ruin your wedding and your life. When you say:[i:2p5ijhis] I don't know what possible solution there could be other than us just having a tiny wedding with almost no one there. [/i:2p5ijhis] This makes me so sad. This man has already done enough damage to your life, and now he is continuing to do so.
Maybe telling what happened to your OH is not an option now for you but it might be one day. Will it not be possible to have a conversation with your OH and explain that you don't want him at your wedding, to trust you, there are reasons for you not to want him there. Without explaining it all.
By the way no matter how drunk you were that night, there is absolutely no excuse for his attack.
I wish you well
I am so sorry to hear what you've gone through.
My 2 cents are that you should really tell your OH. He's going to be your husband and I think you should tell him - Its really the only way you can justify not wanting him at your wedding. Your OH doesn't have to tell James who you are, nor has he to say it to him...
Anne Cordelia Shirley