Advice Please!!

We've Moved!

Our wonderful discussion forums have now moved to Facebook...

Click to join us in our HIGM ("Help I'm Getting Married") group!

SparklyB2B Posts: 1131
Am in total shock... just got a text message from a girl I used to be good friends with up until about 2 yrs ago when she went off the rails.. Text is as follows, Hi X , I am really sorry to text you but I am desperate. I split up from my boyfriend last mth & he is refusing to give any financial support to me & my daughter. I am short €500 for our rent this month & we are going to be kicked out of our Appartment if I cant come up with this in the next few days. Can you please help - myself & my daughter are going to be homeless otherwise. What the hell do I do, do I give her the money??
gerbil Posts: 3528
In all honesty I would not give her money. We have a friend who has gone off the rails too, in his case with drink and he constantly asked us for money for rent etc. DH used to reply that he would give him any help he oculd to get his life in order, bar money. He never took us up on the offer. If it wasn;t hard cold cash - he didn't want it. DH had given him money before and it never went on rent, only drink. Other friends had also supported him and he owes one over 3 grand. If you feel you had good reason not to be close anymore, then you are not going to do her any favours now by handing her money. If you are really worried, then maybe offering to ring social services etc for her might be an option, but I suspect if there is no cash involved then like my friend she won't want to know.
Babyloco Posts: 964
Could you maybe arrange to meet up with her and have a chat first. You should be able to judge from talking to her face to face what the situation is
Mrs2babridesoon Posts: 3319
I absolutely wouldn't! Where are all her family/friends? You haven't seen her in two years and this is the first text :eek What happens next month when she is short again, you'd only be fixing her problem for a few weeks. You have a great get out clause the whole country is finding it financially tough you can say you don't have that kind of money to give especially at this short notice. There are organisations that can help her like social welfare or SVP. Personally I think she is chancing her arm, God forbid I was in her position I have a good few friends/family I could call on first before I'd have to resort to friends I haven't contacted in years. Please don't be taken for a ride. If the guilt is killing you, you could offer a food parcel etc but personally I would be directing her towards Social welfare/SVP.
1