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charlie crown Posts: 377
Hi All Sorry I don't get much chance to post these days, but had to get this out somewhere. My manager is driving me crazy, she insists on undermining me at every turn just to fulfil her need for control/power. It's an ongoing issue but I'm just not so well able to handle it these days what with being pregnant and my dad being very unwell. We've been told he only has months to live. Feel at my wits end sometimes. Feels good to get that out, sorry for moaning
lamb nose Posts: 679
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mama sugar Posts: 1387
oh charlie first off ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((big hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I am so sorry the terrible time you are going through having to deal with the news of your dad is hard enough on top of what is going on in work. I s there any way you could speak to someone higher than the lady you work with and explain about your dad and take time off and spend it with him make the most of the time you have every precious moment counts. My nan was sadly very sick last year I was so close to her and I spend every spare second I could with her it was hard going alot of traveling and I was pregnant but I would never change it and I look back now and think I am so glad that I got to spend those precious moments with her. So maybe if you explain in work you might be able to take a week off or so and do this for you and your dad. I am here if you ever need to talk just pm me lots of love x
BBC2bKinnitty Posts: 58
I am so sorry to hear your news, I too have been through the pain of very sick parent. I totally agree with Mama Sugar why dont you try and get some time off, or go to the docs and get signed off for a week or so through stress, that will teach that bitch manager you are working for. I get totally upset and annoyed how some people are so bloody heartless. Dont let it get you down sweetie, chin up. If you need to talk I am here, and I understand what you are going through. BBC x
charlie crown Posts: 377
Thanks so much girls, I actually had tears in my eyes reading your replys, I guess I haven't taken the time to allow myself to do that yet. I feel relly torn, I want to stand my ground with my boss and argue my case but on the other hand I don't want the hassle and don't want to upset myself and cause complications with my pregnancy, shes definitely not worth that, but what do I do then? I have spoken with her manager who is sympathetic as I think he finds her extremely difficult also, but if I want him to do anything, it means making abigger issue out of it and so I'm back to the same dilemma! I have booked a weeks leave in a couple of weeks time and can't wait for that to come round, I was at GP the other day and was going to ask her for a cert, but everything is perfect healthwise so I didn't.
mama sugar Posts: 1387
well charli good on you for going above her and telling her boss at least the situation is documented. Now decisions have to be made are you going back to work after the baby? if so and you feel she won't change even after a warning from her boss you need to take it further, if it is getting you down. But if it is the case that you may not return to work after the babs I would just stick it out as best as I could and If she speaks to you inappropiatly say it out straight to her. I am having lots of hassel in work here and it is stressing me out and it is not good for the baby.....so I decided I would let it lie although that was after a meeting with the two owners and I told them that I felt they were acting differently to me since I announced my pregnancy and I was being discriminated against once I put everything out on the table I felt a bit better for it but nothing has changed so I told myself no matter what happens after maternity I am looking for a new job. If it is the case that you can feel yourself getting stressed about it go to the doctor explain the situation and I am sure she could give you a cert for a week. Or if you want to stand your ground go above her again and tell your boss that you are so stressed about the whole situation that something has to be done even if it is only a verbal warning from him/her. might just cop that wagon on x Take care of you and babs.
madmam Posts: 1294
Hi Charlie, Poor you - I am going throught the same, but with my colleague. She seems to think she is above me when shes not. She undermines me whenever she gets the chance, in front of people and bullies me behind closed doors. I am taking it further (after 7 years!) as I have had enough, and have bigger fish to fry at this stage of my life. I have contacted my union, and they are setting up a meeting. Nothing else I can do. When I posted this problem a couple fo months ago, one WOLer suggested keeping a diary, and to take down everyhting she does/says. I have done that, and feel I am taking control of the situation somewhat. Maybe you could try this too? HTH
charlie crown Posts: 377
Oh I don't know, I'd love to change jobs, but my problem is I work in a very narrow area and have a really good job at the moment. It's very difficult to find something else in my area of work at all never mind a job that pays as well as this one, so I don't want to cut off my nose desite my face if you know what I mean. It's really difficult to list what she has done wrong per say, because she is my manager she has the right to question my work if she wants. What annoys me is that I am well trained and very experienced and I know I do a good job, she just insists on contradicting me for reasons of self importance. It's difficult to take her to task on it all the time as it would be constant confrontation and I'm not sure if it would do any good. The only other option is to ask her senior for a transfer or something. Thanks for your advice girls it's much appreciated.
Popsy Posts: 229
Oh dear, you really dont need any cr*p from people at the moment. :xox :xox Hang on in there, I'll keep your dad in my prayers too xx
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