Anyone's child come back 'normal' from an assessment of need

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katiebaby78 Posts: 679
Firstly, i'll apologise for using the term 'normal' because I actually don't know what else to call it. I have a 3 year old who I seriously suspect is not 'normal' as 3 year olds go. He can be your typical 3 year old but can flip out to levels I never thought possible. His meltdowns are extreme, he can be violent towards us and they can last anything from a half hour to 2/3 hours. He has broken down myself and my husband. I feel it may be Dyspraxia or a sensory issue. Ive put in an assessment of needs so on a waiting list to see an Occupational therapist, a Psychiatrist and a Speech therapist. Im now wondering what happens if we never find out what the issue is with him or if they tell me he's a completely normal child?
T1979 Posts: 23
Wow I could have wrote's like you are describing my little boy. He's 3 and 9 months and an absolute terror. He was assessed when he was 2 and 4 months and was said to be 'normal'. The assessment officer said he was naughty and difficult and finding it hard to find his place in the family as he's the youngest of 4. He's in playschool now since sept and the teacher says he's an angel, never a wrong word. At home it's a different story. Like you..we are broken, totally defeated by him. He shouts and screams his way through the day, hitting, kicking, spitting, throwing toys, breaking stuff. Can't sit down for a minute, no attention span, not even to colour, watch tv,play etc. It's exhausting. Yesterday was a particularly bad day. He calls us all names and tells us to go away. Time out makes no odds, tried earnings and confiscating toys..he doesn't give a hoot.My other 3 were no angels but this is different. I'm not sure if we can look for another assessment though. I was thinking of asking the teacher as she has recommended another kid in the preschool be assessed. She'll think I'm mad though as he's so good for her. Even our parents must think we are making it up as he's such an angel with them. I have deep scratches all over my wrists at the moment from one his melt downs. I'm not sure what normal is either but I don't think this is it! You have my sympathy anyway.
katiebaby78 Posts: 679
Thank you so much for your response. Your boy most certainly sounds like my boy. Hes an angel in school, childminders and for our parents but its like a switch goes off when he gets home. We had a day 2 weeks ago and he had a hysterical tantrum that lasted 2.5 hours. He's bit me, hit me, scratched me etc. He can be an absolute lovely boy but this never lasts long before we're back to square one. I have a 5 year old too. We have to be doing something right because he's an angel. They do have different temperaments but DS2 is off the charts. He's not trying to find his place in the family. He's ruling the roost and his mood dictates everyones mood in the house. He has some OCD type traits too like the duvet CANNOT touch him, being wrapped completely in a towel for bed. Im currently documenting everything because its so easy to forget some of the stuff. I know everyone says stay away from google but I honestly think he has dyspraxia or some sensory processing disorder. When I applied for him to be assessed my husband actually said hed come back normal. I am his mother and I KNOW he needs some sort of help. I was describing him to a colleague lately and his son was the exact same. At 8 he was diagnosed with dyspraxia and dyslexia. He has had us both in tears. Tell me how was your boy as a baby?? DS has always been a nightmare. There's very little pleasure in being his mammy. Awful to say I know.
T1979 Posts: 23
Hi, he was a dreadful baby. Terrible feeder and sleeper. I breastfed him for 11 months and he was never happy. Always whinging and unsettled. I remember thinking even in the early days that I didn't enjoy him like l did the others. He didn't sleep for a year and we had to get a sleep trainer to come to the house, she worked miracles and he is still a super sleeper thankfully. It's the only break we get! He is also affecting everyone in this house, he had no problem finding his place..he's the boss! My other kids try so hard with him but they are losing patience now too. He used to have some little OCD type traits like not being able to walk past an open door, he'd have to close it. I don't think he does stuff like that now though. I think he's hyper active but I just don't know what to do. He has been to speech therapy and is only talking a year now and is still not at the level he should be. My head is wrecked with him!