Are you getting married in a church/registry office/venue?

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cherries on top Posts: 521
Following on from another good debate in a thread about babtising your children etc.... it has really made me think why am I getting married in a church? Myself and h2b are not religious. I personally believe there is something out there but I don't believe in the Catholic Churches teachings. I have my own faith. We had our church booked for the end of next year and after reading that thread it really made me think. My [b:19abvabp]only[/b:19abvabp] reason for getting married in the church was that it was a fabulous church. Some may know it, its Laytown Church, its just a nromal building but it has a floor to ceiling window that overlooks the sea which is just beautiful. This was the only reason I could think of for getting married in the church. How stupid is that? :eek I never pay attention in church (when at weddings/baptisms etc) and we don't even go up for communion. I don't even follow the prayers as I don't know them. So after a very long think about it we've cancelled the church and are going to use our venue instead. My mum was initially upset but once I expained that we would just feel like hypocrites, she eventually came around to the idea. i'd be interested to know how many are getting married in a church or the venue? Don't really want to turn it into a religious debate as that would be never ending >:o) but I'd be interested to know your thoughts?
StupidSexyFlanders Posts: 8402
Wow, fair play to you. I really admire people who stand by their convictions and to me, getting married in a Catholic church when you freely admit to not following Catholic doctrine is the height of hypocrisy. We were at a wedding last Thursday and all I could think listening to the bride and groom say they would include God in their lives and they were now one with God etc. was "Yeah, right". On my wedding day of all days I would hate to stand in front of all of my friends and family spouting a load stuff I didn't believe in just because the surroundings might be nice, and think that people standing behind me weren't taking what I said seriously. So we are having a civil ceremony in our reception venue and everything we say we will mean.
cherries on top Posts: 521
Thanks v excited b2b. When we sat down and thought about it we had no reason to get married in a church. The service I just don't think would suit us and we'd be dying for it to be over, most of what the priest would be saying would mean nothing at all to us. TBH priests kinda freak me out, though the one in Laytown is lovely, he's younger than most. I didn't want a registry office as my sis got married in one about 10years ago and it wasn't nice. I'm sure you could do loads with it but even she didn't like it at the end. I think I can really make the venue look great. I'm really happy now I've made the choice of the venue, they are well used to it and it looks stunning when done up. Since we got engaged I dreamt of the church being lit up with just candle lights (not really a flower person) and this was making me want to go for the church. Though now I've thought about it I can really make the venue to look fantastic and have a service that would be perfect for us. BTW, I'm not dissing anyone who is getting married in a church, I think they are beautiful, but for us we've now realised that its just not for us to get married there as we would feel liky hyprocites....
StupidSexyFlanders Posts: 8402
[quote="Morrigin":239snlcf]t was all about the couple and they're personalities and tastes were reflected in their readings and songs (they exited to The Darkness - I believe in a thing called love :o0 ) It was so unique and I'll always smile when I remember their ceremony.[/quote:239snlcf] I love that! I'd love to walk up the aisle to ABBA's I Do, I Do, I Do a la Muriel :o0 (I won't though - H2B would leave me standing at the top of it!)
pigeonwife Posts: 3789
We got married in our local church but go to Mass every Sunday and are quite involved in our local parish. Hey I even dreamed I was giving out communion last night. Dreamt we had this radical new priest who was using crisps as communion wafers :o0 :o0 :o0
msbelle Posts: 726
i voted Church aswell, im not a bible basher by any means but i have my faith and i have started to take great comfort in my religion and prayers. couldnt imagine my wedding any other way :-8
Trillian Posts: 1685
I would have been similar in wanting the church purely for it's sense of occasion - thankfully the change in the civil ceremony law made that unnecessary. We got married in a civil ceremony in our venue, it was really beautiful. We had the whole lot - singer, harp music, candles, walking down the aisle, white dress, flowers - the only difference was the lack of a mass and blessing. The actual wedding bit is the same - it's a legal ceremony too remember in the church. We were both raised Catholic btw so in theory church would not have been a problem if we had any beliefs, strangely most of my family assumed we had civil thinking OH was not Catholic. To my lack of credit for the sake of an easy life I let them think that. :-8
JDD Posts: 1316
We're having ours in a venue. To be honest, if they only choice was a registry office or a church, I'd choose the church. I'd like to think I'd stick by my beliefs (my H2B is athiest and I'm lapsed catholic) but I've been to a couple of registry office weddings and they're totally impersonal. Imagine getting married in your work storage room and it comes close. I'm getting married in the UK and they've been doing venue weddings for years, so it's a lot nicer a set up there. You can get married in castles and manor houses. Our wedding (hopefully, weather permitting) will be outside with us and the registrar under a cupola and the rest of the guests sitting on chairs arranged in a half circle. The hotel is on the side of a hill with a great view over the bay below. I couldn't imagine a more beautiful place. I don't think a church could beat it.
BusyDee Posts: 8527
Civil ceremony in the gardens of our venue in malta :o)ll
Misses Happy Posts: 18
Hey, Just wanted to give my tuppence worth... I would love to be getting married in my local church but because the OH is divorced we're not allowed. It's caused a serious crisis of faith for me because I feel like we're not accepted in my church. I always knew the divorce was going to be an issue but until I heard my parish priest tell me it wasn't possible it became very real. I have the greatest respect for my OH, he's been through more than the average person and he's just the kindest most genuine person I've ever met. I suppose what frustrates me is when couples decide to get married in church just because they can... or because it's a nice pictuesque place and not because they want to get wed in front of God. I'm really sorry if that sounds like jealousy...it quite possibly is! Anyho, good luck to all whever they get wed. :lvs