So the wedding is all planned and there is only 9 months to go but recently there was a significant death in my family and I know feel like i no longer want he big wedding and my fiance and i are thinking of scrapping it altogether and heading off just the 2 of us with no major financial loss. I was wondering if this happened to anyone else or what you all think
So sorry to hear of the death in your family. In a couple of months you might feel different and be more in form for the wedding you've plans, which I'm guessing took a lot of time, effort and financial planning. We didn't have the big wedding, went abroad just the two of us and loved our day, I was very happy to sneak off with little fuss, I hate drama. Just give yourself a bit of time yee might feel different in time!
So sorry to hear about your loss. I can relate to you, my mum passed away in May of this year. Our wedding is 9th July 2016. Like you, we thought about cancelling the whole thing and just going away to get married BUT then I thought about how much my mum was involved in planning the wedding before she died and I felt it would be wrong to cancel the whole thing. I know it's going to be extremely hard on the day but I think I will see her in a lot of the day and I think it's nice to go ahead because she was so excited about it. I think it's a very personal choice that only you & your partner can make. Just remember if the death in you're family was recent things will be very raw, you might look at things differently in a few months.
So sorry for your loss.
I presume if it's only nine months away, all the family know that you're planning to get married.
We've had two deaths on his side of the family in last year - one was only a few weeks ago, and the other's first anniversary is the week before our wedding, so they are still very raw. And my dad only passed away two years ago. But we never thought for a second about changing our plans as everyone is just so looking forward to coming together for a celebration and a happy occasion. It could be just what you're family need, and you too.
We have decided to remember those people in our mass. So I wrote a really nice prayer of the faithful and referenced them by name. I know it will upset their two families a little bit to hear the names, but it also makes those two people part of our day and it lets the family know that we are still thinking of them.
Planning the wedding knowing my Dad isn't going to be there has been tougher than I ever imagined, but I've included a few subtle things that will mean he is there in spirit with me on the day.
Don't make any rash decisions. Maybe just set the wedding plans aside for a few weeks and deal with your grief first and look at it again in a month.