Children at Wedding - advice needed

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manxmrs Posts: 850
Hi there We are getting wed Aug next year, and don't plan to invite kids - as we wish to have an 'adult only' affair. However, one couple who will be travelling from UK will have a 6yr old, and before we even said kids were coming along, asked me "can we get a family room at the hotel for John" (not real name). It's a bit tricky, as they don't speak to the child's grandparents or her sister, so haven't got anyone to leave him at home with while they're here. He'll be only child there and it may look bad if we have just him and no-one else, and may not go down very well. Do you think we should warn parents before the official invites go out and tell them this situation? Thanks for any advice offered :wv
mrs pitt Posts: 164
I think start as you mean to go on. Let that couple know that you werent planning on having children. When we set our date and we're letting friends know I said to some with kids, our wedding is on x date, cant wait to have you there, make sure and book the babysitter well in advance, we'll be on the dancefloor all night . Or something to that effect. All our friends took it well. Well to our faces anyway!!
deda Posts: 1220
I just don't get some people surely if you wanted John and Anne to bring their kids along then surely you invite would say John, Anne, Fred and George are invited to attend. If the invite does not include the kids then HELLO your kids are not invited. What is up with some people?? When in God's green earth would someone want kids who are not related to them at the wedding. If I'm invited to a wedding I wouldn't dream of bringing my kids unless its a family wedding. People are weird!!!
nutcake Posts: 1168
yea i think you will have to let them know asap that no kids are allowed. its not your fault that they dont have anyone to mind him :o0 i think if you make allowances for one you may make it for all or it will just cause resentment, the child would be bored silly ina roon full of adults anyway, imo
chocbiscuitcake Posts: 658
Sorry but if you are inviting someone to travel from another country to your wedding, it is not unreasonable that they would bring their young child with them. I think you should let them bring him; if you really don't want other children there, other parents will understand that the situation is different for those who are travelling from abroad. I don't think you need to contact anyone to explain anything!
Weddingloon Posts: 445
[quote="chocbiscuitcake":1s6hrg32]Sorry but if you are inviting someone to travel from another country to your wedding, it is not unreasonable that they would bring their young child with them. I think you should let them bring him; if you really don't want other children there, other parents will understand that the situation is different for those who are travelling from abroad. I don't think you need to contact anyone to explain anything![/quote:1s6hrg32] I agree with this!! If it were me personally I would arrange a babysitter but if I didn't have anyone to do that, I just wouldn't be able to go. So I guess decide how important their presence is to you too! I wouldn't explain myself to anyone either, it's nobody's business and any reasonable person would understand it is tricky where someone is travelling! :wv
MrsMay09 Posts: 382
I only invited my nieces and nephews to my wedding. It didnt even enter my head about friends kids. No-one even questioned it. In saying that though if a friend of mine was travelling a long distance I would extend the invite to children then as its not a matter of the child staying over in someones house for one night.
Nadie Posts: 1111
You can make one exception with this fella and still have a child-free wedding, seems a bit harsh to have him in the UK while the parents are here. We had a no kids at all at our wedding, not even nieces and nephews as there are too many. Saying that, my SIL phoned us two days before the wedding asking could she bring her three as they couldn't get a babysitter (they don't talk to the husband's family and all her family were at our wedding!). So that was grand. Everyone knows the situation they're in and if they were cross about it, they never let on! I do think it's a good idea to look into a hotel babysitting service though and send her that info along with the rooms info she was looking for, without specifically saying we don't want child at full day...
Crostini Posts: 1105
yeah i'd just tell them out that there are no children invited and send on the details of the hotel babysitting service.
Starbar2010 Posts: 1261
Well i think since they are travelling perhaps you shoud let the kid come to the meal and make sure he sits with his parents? Then after wards ask them could they arrange for a baby sitter as you really would rather them spend the night with them than having them worry about the little one. Kinda the best of both worlds