does grooms father make a speech??????

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smileybee Posts: 82
right! i need a bit of help here. my h2b's father said that he doesn't have to make a speech. Is this true. he saids only the bride's father does. i'm really disapointed he won't say a few words. :o(
Peaseblossom Posts: 6642
its optional
Maybethisyear13 Posts: 992
Hey, Traditionally he would but it's not considered to be as big as the Best Man's speech or that of the Father of the Bride. Having said that no one "has" to do anything on the day. I totally understand that you would be disappointed if he decided not to speak but it's up to him at the end of the day and he might be terrified of public speaking or something! Best of luck
NewGirl Posts: 1143
Usually FOB then FOG - some people just cant speak in public - it actually ruins their day if they know they have th speak - I decided not to myself for this reason - My Father Froze when it came to his speech - he had it all written in front of him but couldn't get it out - it ruined his day - I would have prefared if he had of told me he didn't want to speek - he does enough - he doesnt need to stand up in public to tell everyone how he feels. :lvs
smileybee Posts: 82
[quote="NewGirl":3cggitnx]Usually FOB then FOG - some people just cant speak in public - it actually ruins their day if they know they have th speak - I decided not to myself for this reason - My Father Froze when it came to his speech - he had it all written in front of him but couldn't get it out - it ruined his day - I would have prefared if he had of told me he didn't want to speek - he does enough - he doesnt need to stand up in public to tell everyone how he feels. :lvs[/quote:3cggitnx] ah thax for that. i know he is such a shy person and i suppose i am just being selfish. He hates speaking in front of people so i'll tell him its ok. I shouldn't let little things like that bother me!
Grunge Bride Posts: 2529
Yep I think it's optional, he can go after the FOB if he wants to, but no obligation on him. If he'd be unhappy, best to leave him be. The important thing is that everyone enjoys themselves!
Roxanne Posts: 3201
I don't think anyone should have to speak if they really don't want to. Public speaking is genuinely some people's greatest fear - I read a survey somewhere that said more people fear speaking in public than they fear death!!! My DH had to give a speech when he was his brother's best man, and even though he's not exactly shy, it did ruin the wedding him. He was so nervous he didn't eat any dinner and all he remembers from the day is that feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. So if your h2b's Dad can be spared that, I'd say let him! No-one will think it's odd that he doesn't speak, as the girls have already said, it's optional.
Milly83 Posts: 3620
I have been to a lot of weddings where the groom's father did not speak. It's very hard for some people to do this and I would never pressurise anyone into doing it. My H2B is worried about it too. He's not getting out of it though! I know he doesn't have that fear!!!! :o0
Ca cest moi Posts: 7855
[quote="Grunge Bride":20r8v545]Yep I think it's optional, he can go after the FOB if he wants to, but no obligation on him. If he'd be unhappy, best to leave him be. The important thing is that everyone enjoys themselves![/quote:20r8v545] Totally agree, it is more important that everyone enjoy themselves.
xxGroomxx Posts: 19
If you really want him to speak then you should tell him but also let him know that it is his choice and it is ok if he doesn't. I didn't even make a speech at my own wedding :ooh :ooh