Does this seem mean?

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lovelyb2b Posts: 733
Hi everybody This has prob already been posted alot but sorry just my mam is doing my head in. When we arrive at our hotel, we are having tea, coffee and biscuits served and a pianist playing in the background. Then there is champagne reception for bridal party. Then for our meal 2 glasses of wine per person is being served, this is to include the toast. Now my mam is saying that it just seems mean, no arrival drinks or no toast drink but does it???? O:| O:| Please be honest. I thought this was standard and the others weren't expected of ppl esp now in the big R :eek Does it seem mean???? :wv
Windaleen Posts: 118
I'm having tea, coffee, biscuits and cocktails on arrival. Then I'm having wine on the tables and a toast. BUT...I've been at a number of weddings at which no alcohol drink was served to welcome guests back to the hotel and no toast drink was served but wine was provided on the table. And alternitively at which a toast was provided and no wine was served. I honestly don't think what you are doing is mean. If you're loaded now thats a different story but if you just dont have the cash or if you are trying to stick to a budget well then i think thats fine! I've never passed a bad comment on any of the weddings I've been too. Do what you can afford and dont be put under pressure by your mum (love them as much as we do), maybe she'd like to do you the honour of paying for your toast...i.e a toast to my beautiful girl :hic
sunflowergalcork Posts: 481
oh mothers!! i was at a wedding last week and there was punch on arrival, no wine with the meal and there was a toast drink. it was totally grand, no one commented either way. i dont think what u have is mean. if u are bringing ure own wine, maybe u cud open some bottles at arrival, we did that. in this day and age maybe u cud try to swing free punch from them. if u do want to change, those are my ideas. but i think what u have is grand, hope that helps
lovelyb2b Posts: 733
A thanks girls Sometimes you'd be lost without this site :xxs I wouldn't mind but my H2B hasn't being working in nearly 7mths now and mam knows the situation. But as OP said we still do love them :o0 :o0 Thanks again :wv
angel baby Posts: 78
I think its fine. I love weddings but i'd never notice whether there was a drinks arrival reception thing anyway! Honestly save where you can and be glad for it! Nobody will comment.
Shoelover Posts: 473
not at all girly. hate when people do the 'mean' thing...its' a total parent generation thing like! my mil & fil are always going on about mean neighbors and the likes and it does my head in. they are 'fruggle' themselves like so it s a total pot kettle black situation. i know mums mean well, and that generation tend to care so much about what other ppl think. i once received a gift fo xmas from a relative of a raggy jumper 3 sizes too big for me and when i went to return it in M&S they were gone so id to take a refund...it had only cost €3!! the same person is always going on about 'mean' ppl....doing my head in!!....my issue wasn't with the cost of the jumper....it was the fact that they had wasted 3 euros on something that was only given cause they wanted to be seen to give a gift! i got a credit note and bought myself a nice sambo!! much more enjoyable! there will always be one who will sniff a comment no matter what you do., if you have a lavish champagne reception with choco fountain, someone will say you're 'above yourselves' and if you have a simple reception your 'mean'................do what pleases you darling, cause you certainlyl can't please everyone, they'll have forgotten all by the next month! (ps those comments arn't directed at your mum....just the parental generation in general!)
lovelyb2b Posts: 733
Thanks all again. I think 2 glasses of wine are plenty at a wedding. The last one I was at I had water and wine and a bottle of something I had got before the meal all in front of me. So I think I will take your advice and do what pleases us. :o0 Thanks all O-O
littlemisshopeful Posts: 6101
It is perfect in my opinion. We are having tea/coffee and biscuits on arrival. one glass of wine and a top up and a toast drink of choice, but I have only ever had alcohol on arrival at foreign weddings and never in Ireland. My parents have very fixed ideas about what is right and wrong as well and tyhings have been tense at times as they are paying the reception, so I empathize with you. Best of luck and happy preparations.
gottabfp Posts: 5641
im only having tea and coffee for arrival, and sparkling wine for toast. its way too much exspence to buy everyone a drink!
vonanto Posts: 395
Oh thank god!!!!! We r having sparling wine, fruit punch and tea and coffee on arrival and then we were going to have 2 glasses of wine and a top u with the meal and a toast drink and I was totally stressing out about it to be honest. I thought we would get the wine cheaper but its really not happening so maybe I could cut the top up drink?? What do ye think?? Sorry for hijacking but this has been really bugging me and I'm getting a lot of grief from the moms!!!