Hey Wiggles, I can't really comment as my situation is different to yours, in that I work fulltime and do a bit of part time free lance as well. H2B works full time as well, but it would be me that earns more (twice as much without the free lance stuff).
We do however pay everything 50-50, and it's normally H2B insisting on that. He will always treat me though, small gifts and stuff every once in a while. I also kinda notice when he has a good week in work and has a bit extra - he mightn't actually say it, but he'll suggest taking me out somewhere nice.
I know it's about 100 years ago, but when my mam wasn't working and stayed at home rearing us, my dad always gave her money every week for house stuff and kids stuff, as well as what she needed. In our house it was called her 'wages' and he still gives her the 'wages' every week, even though she's working. But he paid all the house stuff.
If she needed more she'd ask, and my da would do without something to give it to her. But as I say, it's a million years ago now.
I don't want to sound judgemental or critical, but why do you give him money when he's working and (I assume) would have more than you? None of my business!!
Hopefully you will get some advice, sorry am not much use.
We pay 50:50 for the mortgage. Dh pays for most of the bills, I pay health insurance, tv licence and a couple of other small ones. Whoever does the grocery shopping pays for that, and dh generally pays for any big expenses such as stuff for the house etc. This has worked well for us so far, as he earns more than me - just as well considering that he pays for more things than I do!
we own our cars with no loans
rent from tenants pays for our 2 investment properties
hubby pays our mortgage
i pay childminding bills and for all grocery shopping
i pay esb and telephone
his company pay his vodafone bill and all petrol/diesel
i buy my own petrol
[quote:1sxrkaaw]I never have any money for myself .. and he never offers me anything .. yet i seem to be always offering what bit of money i have to him.
what? thats mad - what do you pay your share out of? do you work from home?
we both work in full time employment and earn roughly same wage, everythings, bills, mortgage, groceries is spilt down middle 50/50, he pays for his van and I pay for my catalogue, credit card etc
I work part time , h2b earns about 5 times what I earn , everything goes into our joint acc and all bills come out of there . We both withdraw what we need (me sometimes a little more
Just up until recently we had a joint account and both monies went into it but hubby had no card so I had to “give” him money (well so to speak!!)
But we’ve just recently changed it whereby, we both put x into the main bank account and that pays all bills/mortgage and some savings.
And then the rest of our money is our own to do what we want with it!!!
Hubby though he was getting “done” cause he though he never had money…but now he just realises how good he had it and wants to change back!!!!
Over my dead body!
[quote="Wiggles":137mc46d]My money comes from Childrens allowance and taking students .. (host family) its not much .. however i make it go a-long way.
When i ask him what he does with his money he always says .. i had to pay for esb, mortgage, car loan, blah blah blah .. you would think these bills come in on a daily basis the way he talks. Does my head in.
I think half the time i live off my credit card. Its just very hard when birthdays - weddings come around .. and I have to give my half .. and I dont always have the money .. which is the case this week. Its my mams birthday and my cousins wedding .. and I have to go in on a present but am smashed.
If i look to h2b for money .. he will just tell me he aint got it !![/quote:137mc46d]
That sounds insane wiggles. He expects you to pay 50% towards pressies when he's the one earning and you're supposed to pay out from either the children's allowance or student money??? I know he pays the mortgage/bills but still - it seems a bit mad to me.
oh my god! that is a joke - you're at home minding his kids (and yes i know their yours too) and he begrudges you money! he needs a serious reality check