Engagement Logistics Conundrum

Hi All, Newly engaged and seeking some advice: We got engaged 2 weeks ago and are yet to celebrate (unexpected circumstances helped that)., Anyway we come from 2 different towns and 2 very different families but to add to the horror we've lived in another city for a good number of years now. Every forum suggests having 2 parties but we would like to have one party with all our friends and family. Conundrum is H2B is from West Limerick and I'm from South Limerick about 1hr drive apart but we lived in the city, his family are conservative don't like the pub scene while my family are borderline over drinkers & our friends then are alcoholic. I really don't want to have to cater for everyone but what do you do that will keep everyone happy you won't have the expense of over night stays for people and still try bring everyone together?? Very new to all this, i'm the first of my friends to get married... PLEASE HELP the party is planned for a month's time

What do you and him normally do for a night out? Where is your local? Can you reserve an area there? Although it might not be his families scene, it’s your and your fiance’s scene. If you’re this hyped about the engagement party, I’d go to the Doctor now for a Prozac prescription before planning the wedding! It’s about you and him. It sounds as though the City is a good spot. Half ways for both families (they can car pool/get a mini bus/taxi/lift). I doubt you would be the first to have an event that wasn’t on their doorstep for either family. Arrange it, ask them to come. If they can’t, they can take you both for dinner at another time as a family celebration and you can party the night away with the friends (who will be the main craic anyway!) and family who do make it. It’s what you and him are most comfortable doing. There’s no point in trying something more swanky than you’re use to in pretense, you won’t enjoy it. Best of luck!

If it was me, I think I'd nearly aim for the area where the drinkers are easily accommodated / comfortable - the chances are that the conservative people will only show their faces anyway, so if they have the excuse of "I have to drive, can't have a drink, dammit!" then it might work out for the best? You know them best so I'd say do whatever you think is the easiest on everyone, my own engagement party was nothing like I'd visualised it in the past, because my OH very kindly tried to facilitate my elderly parents, so it really ended up just being a regular quiet night in the pub because of that, whereas I'd always pictured a DJ and mighty craic. It was a non-event in my eyes, don't even remember it or consider it important. Everyone was there but there wasn't much mingling or anything cos everyone was just sitting in their regular groups chatting. If we'd been dancing and drunk and having the craic, it would probably have been better. So don't let the conservative ones take over is my advice!!!

Thank you Ladies <3 I think i'm definitely too much of a people pleaser and i think i may need to work on that before the planning starts (NinjaDonDon i may take your advice on the prozac )