Find out babies gender or not???

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allmarried Posts: 25
Hi All, I'm looking for some advice here, i'm due to have my 20 week scan in the next couple of weeks and we can't decide if we should find out the gender or not, this is our first child and we're in two minds about whether we should find out or not. I don't really like suprises and we find it hard to decide on things like names etc so for that reason i think maybe we should but i'm afraid we'll regret it!! Does anybody have any advice, did anybody find out and have regrets??
ructions Posts: 2689
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babydust2012 Posts: 4736
I really wanted to find out with DS but hubby didn't so we didn't. It was so much fun not knowing but in the back of my head I think I always knew I was having a boy? This time round I don't want to find out at all because I think it'll be our last so I'd like the surprise!!! We had no names going into the labour ward and picked a random name we hadn't discussed once DS was born!! It sounds like you really want to find out so I'd say go for it :o)ll :o)ll :o)ll
ReginaFalange Posts: 10290
Everyone's different. I couldn't stand NOT knowing and wanted to find out as soon as I could. Loved having the names picked and loved being about to say "he" etc.. Believe me when they pulled a human out of me I still got an almighty shock. I was just plodding along being pregnant and then they put a little human on me- silly and all as it sounds that in itself was enough of a surprise. But I know lots of people who love the not knowing so there is no right or wrong and I doubt you'll regret it either way.
Anne Cordelia Shirley Posts: 4731
I didn't find out on either. DH would have preferred knowing, mainly for planning names and clothes. No regrets about not knowing for me, loved the announcement each time.
kohl Posts: 108
Totally each to their own. I didnt want to know from the start but dh kind of wanted to know. In the meantime friends found out and have had their baby and it made me certain I didnt want to know and like the idea of waiting to see what we have.
rosiemama Posts: 3363
I loved knowing. When we found out DS1 was a boy we told everyone, but with DD we kept it quiet - our little secret! So much better just us knowing and we'll do the same this time. DH didn't find out on DS2, although I did and didn't tell him (previously agreed with him). I couldn't not find out! I have no patience for surprises, I liked being able to picture the baby in my head as a he or she. We still had the surprise element when we found out, and especially when finding out DD was a girl, DH took me for lunch after the scan and I was on cloud nine, so excited! Didn't take away from the birth or meeting my babies for the first time. Its a personal decision, but if you want to do it go for it!
Weird Cat Lady Posts: 3501
[quote="rosiemama":1d7bgcpg]DH didn't find out on DS2, although I did and didn't tell him (previously agreed with him)[/quote:1d7bgcpg] How in hell did yiz manage that? I think you'd both be ideal recruits for the Stasi, if it was still around. We thought our powers of intuition were beyond the those of these new fangled machines, and presumed it was a boy. Went into labour with one name for a girl. That was handy.
Buttercup x Posts: 535
We found out and absolutely no regrets. I don't think anybody has regrets over whether they did or didn't. We have kept ours as quiet as possible as we have been told numerous times that it is never 100% a sure thing. It's also nice for it to be just us that knows. I'm 33 weeks now and my mum and DH's mum knows but that's it! The Granddads to be didn't want to know so the Nanas are doing a very good job of keeping it quiet. It's become a bit of a game between them all now to see who'll let it slip or who'll be able to keep it secret to the big date!
Hbombadero Posts: 1960
I'd prefer not to know. It's one of life's surprises. Totally up to the individual but for me I don't see any reason to find out in advance of birth. Other than outfits, most baby buys are gender neutral and baby clothes are easy to pick up. I'm sure you won't regret it one way or the other. Congrats!