Friends/Family Letting you down

Now that they are married and their day is done and dusted? IE.... those who insisted you come to their wedding and stay over in the hotel, and go on uber expensive hen nights/weekends, but now won't return the favour for you?

Is there a good reason for them not going? That is disappointing when you make the effort/expense for them. I had this too 6 mths ago-our friendship has changed over it

No, nothing has happened as such, just see the excuses coming from certain parties about going away for a hen night. But I mostly started the thread to see other peoples experiences.

I would be inclined to say, that times have changed im afraid. People dont have the same disposable income that they may one have had or borrowed for.. It feels unfair, as you have had to find the money already, but i would try and understand peoples changed circumstances too.

I am the first in my group to get married and DH was the 3rd in saying that one of my cousins who i went to didn't bother coming to ours or even bother replying to the RSVP (which I was a little disappointed with) We have about 8 weddings this year (on last count) so fingers crossed we will make it to them all, of the 8 5 came to ours All of them will require overnight stays unfortunately so we'll be B&B'ing it for the most part i'd say.

I'm with you Jawl. I find that my married friends & family couldn't give two hoots about hen parties or anything like that. Yet we had to show lots of excitement and go to everything for theirs. I know times are tough for everyone and I was even in two minds about having a hen or not as I really don't want anyone to come if they honestly can't afford it, but some of the excuses I am getting are so funny.. A few of my friends can't make the wedding now as its too near their due date.. FFS could they not have waited until after our wedding to start making babies

Only one disappointment so far, one of the best men can't afford to stay in the reception hotel the night of the wedding. Which i completely understand as they will just have gotten married themselves a few months before hand and just bought a new house and stuff. But still feel disappointed for OH as the hotel is small and we decided only family and bridal party would stay, his side is already outnumbered and now he is down another one. Especially when there are designer christmas cards sent, designer bathroom towels bought, must have designer handbags purchased........iykwim

[quote="Jawl":24s4xj5m]Now that they are married and their day is done and dusted? IE.... those who insisted you come to their wedding and stay over in the hotel, and go on uber expensive hen nights/weekends, but now won't return the favour for you? [/quote:24s4xj5m] [quote="Decisions11":24s4xj5m]I'm with you Jawl. I find that my married friends & family couldn't give two hoots about hen parties or anything like that. Yet we had to show lots of excitement and go to everything for theirs. I know times are tough for everyone and I was even in two minds about having a hen or not as I really don't want anyone to come if they honestly can't afford it, but some of the excuses I am getting are so funny..[/quote:24s4xj5m] +1 on both of these posts! I'm one of the last of my group to get married, been on all the expensive hen's, stayed over in all the expensive hotels and now its my turn I feel guilty for asking them to return the favour. I'm also in two minds about having a hen party cos the fun of planning it is gone now iykwim. On one hand I know everyone's finances are tighter now and I don't want to put anyone under pressure, but on the other hand its finally my turn and I want to celebrate like I did for everyone else!

Unfortunately, we have had the same thing. First off the best man pulled out of even being the best man last week, saying he is too nervous, 3 months after being asked, and 1 month after we registered him as a witness. My poor fiance is devastated, and even though we told him we'd get FSIL to make a speech if he would just stand with my fiance, he still won't even do that I am so gutted for him. The best man is just not the shy type I am not buying what he is selling at all, and while I would understand if there were serious reasons, I feel that he owes my fiance a proper explanation after being friends for so long. He even did it over the phone, not face to face Also, I spent alot of money going to a 2 night hen in Glasgow last year, and going to the wedding and now the invite to my ONE night hen in Westport (at a cost of €99 for dinner, B&B, bubbly and nightclub entry because I am trying to keep costs down for my friends) has been declined because they might be going on hols two days after my hen...make of that what you will. Also, on the night of this girls wedding, when I went to say goodnight to her she got angry at me for having the cheek to go to bed at 2am instead of partying all night....hmmm maybe I am not too bothered that invite was declined

Hi girls - i'm glad I seen this post as I was starting to really get peed off with my situation too - the amount of people who have pulled out/ given Crap excuses / not turned up when they were supposed to - have even fallen out with a so called friend - even my own sisters are terrible - showing no interest in organising my hens at all or even talking bout the wedding - They havent helped one bit (these are my bridesmaids) also im practically organising my own hens as my sisters constant use of the word "expense" has grated on me to the point that Im gonna explode if i hear it again I have always gone to parties/weddings/christenings for everyone and never once complained about the "expense" and I feel like the begrudgers should be happy for me now that I'm finally having a big event in my life ...... sorry for the rant but its a long time coming