Going to family wedding 2 weeks after baby due

We've Moved!

Our wonderful discussion forums have now moved to Facebook...

Click to join us in our HIGM ("Help I'm Getting Married") group!

Desert-Moon Posts: 1174
Hi all, DH and my first baby due 2 weeks before a family wedding, and I can't stop worrying about it. First of all what I should do regarding outfit??Obviously I can't try on anything now, as I'm massive. But I surely won't have time to go looking for something with new baby, I'll be busy enough. But should I just buy maybe a size up from my usual size now that there is stuff in the shops? Also I'd like to look my best - doesn't every new mum? But there's so much pressure to look well, and I know from experience, that I certainly won't be looking too hot 2 weeks after having baby! Also I'm planning on breast feeding and I won't have got the hang of it so quick - I'm so afraid of "accidents" IYKWIM. I keep worrying about the day - at my own wedding there were some unpleasent comments about a few of my friends who are overweight by some of DH's family, and I think this may be contributing to my worries. Any advise would be greatly appreciated. I hate the thoughts of having to go out socially so soon after birth - I think thats its so much nicer to get to know baby, bond with them, and stay in your own little world with them for a while before doing a big social family thing. I'm a worrier by nature, and know this all seems so silly. The main thing obviously is that baby is ok - and thank God all is going fine. But I have this at the back of my mind, and am starting to feel very pressurised. Anyone else had experience of this? Thanks :thnk
*bubblez* Posts: 1599
I haven't experienced it but my SIL has like you she had a family event a couple of weeks after the birth... she waited until the last minute to get something ( it was her DD communion) as she felt that every day she was losing weight and if she bought something one week it wouldnt fit her the next as her body was changing and adjusting to not being pg and also that she was losing a lot of the water retention she had towards the end of the birth... she bought her suit on the thurs (a lovely linen suit, was very comfy and not too fussy + easy for b feeding) by the sat it had was a bit big on her... so I'd say try and do something similar... she also had the communion that day her, her husband other dd, new son and grandparents went for a v quiet meal and she went home early... theres no point killing urself to be the life and soul when all u want to do is look after baby... And as for comments about how u look, well ur going to look extremely happy cos u have ur new baba so even if u wore a black bag, greasy hair and not a screed of make up that smile on a new mothers face just makes up for it... and if anyone makes any comment about u carrying baby weight 2 weeks after having a baby I will personally come round and give them a few ;o( ;o( ;o( for you!!
bibikay Posts: 644
Hi Moondesert, don't be stressing, or feeling pressurised .... If baby is born on time, you might well be in great form and dying for a night out. I went to a family night out just 2.5 weeks after DS was born, (restaurant do with 30+ people) from 7pm to 2am, with little baba in tow. No problemo. I too was breastfeeding , but I had expressed and fed him from a bottle. I know a wedding is different as it will be a full day affair, but really all you have to get through is the church and the meal if you want to stay for that. I don't think anyone would bat an eye if you slipped off up to the room with the baba and left DH to the dancing? They'd all just think you were great to come at all. wrt bf/ing and "accidents"... don't worry, breast pads worn inside your bra eliminate all such possibilities. you could either wait and see situation after the birth, and buy something then, or alternatively, you could buy a size up now as you mentioned. Of course... if you went 10 days over , you could very feasibly still be in the hospital on the day of the wedding, and there might be no decision to make at all! I knew about my function in advance but it was around my due date so I had assumed that I'd be heavily pregnant and might be too tired to attend. However, I went over 2 weeks early, so instead I was at the do , in my normal , pre-pregnancy jeans and delighted to be out showing off my new baba. You might well be the same... if your baba comes 2 weeks early, you might even have 4 weeks before the wedding. Wouldn't that be great!
EVIE78 Posts: 687
I went to my best friends wedding when my baby was only 3 weeks old , I waited till after the baby was born to get something to wear, in the end I borrowed something . I had a great day really enjoyed myself.
Desert-Moon Posts: 1174
Thanks for your replies girls, I guess I am stressing needlessly maybe - its just that this wedding is over 120 miles from home, so realistically its going to be a weekend affair! I have asked my best friend to come and stay in hotel too, so she can keep eye on baby, when I go and get some well-earned boogying done!!! I hope it all goes ok, its just the timing thats worrying me. I might start looking for something to wear now - I'll see. I think maybe a flowy dress might be best for hiding the bumpy bits but not too good for breast feeding. Bibikay, I had intended to express later on, but I didn't think it would be a good idea so early. I thought you were meant to give baby a chance to get used to breast before introducing a bottle?
bibikay Posts: 644
Hi , you'll get so much different opinions on anything to do with b/f'ing that it'll spin your head ! In my case, I just tried stuff to see what worked for us and figured it out as we went along. WRT expressing - I tried expressing at 2 weeks and was depressed when after AGES pumping I only got a couple of ounces!! But, tried again a few days later and got 5 or so ounces no problemo. You won't know for sure though how things will be for you until the time comes. I heard loads of dire warnings about "nipple confusion", and that "he needed time to get used to the breast before introducing a bottle" and that DS would "reject the breast if given bottle " (EBM), but all I can say is that we experienced no such problems. I think a big part of this is that from about day 2 in the hospital we were supplementing him with little amounts of formula as he was quite badly jaundiced and needed lots of liquids to flush the jaundice out of his system. This meant that he learnt from the very beginning to switch seamlessly from breast to bottle and back again. And this paid off for us because it gave us the freedom to give him EBM regularly. You and your baba might be the same.. you never know. My advice would be to try it and see how it goes. I'd say it will probably all work out a lot easier than you are anticipating... if you are staying in the hotel where the reception is, and you have your best friend organised to baby sit you are laughing! Sure, baby can be up in the room with your friend, and even if the baby is feeding from breast every 3 hours or so, it still gives you lots of time to pop up and feed him/her, and then go back down stairs and socialise again for another couple hours. In this situation, you don't even have to worry about the style of dress as you will not be feeding in front of people. You can go to room, slip off dress, feed in your dressing gown, pop dress back on and down you go again.... easy peasy! You can even leave your friend to do the burping/rocking back to sleep thing, so again, it cuts down on the amount of time that you actually have to spend feeding, and leaves more room for dancing and some quality time with your hubby! One thing I'd say about choosing the dress is that you need to leave loads of room for boobs! In my case I only went from a D cup to a DD cup, but I know lots of women go up a few cup sizes, so again, you won't know until nearer the time which category you will fall into. Like I said, I'm sure everything will fall into place at the time, and you'll ahve a great time at the wedding. HTH!
luigi Posts: 867
As you know yourself there's every chance you'll still be in maternity clothes 2 weeks after a baby is born and what if baby is 10 days late? A floaty dress does sound like a good suggestion. I know the other girls are saying its great and go and have a good time to yourself, but myself, there was no possible way I could have went even 3 weeks after baby was born to anything that involved any amount of walking or standing (or even sitting!) How well you'll get on will depend on your delivery and how you feel in yourself. I did not particularly feel that I was ready to face the world until he was over a month old. If you feel great then more power to you! But remember not to stress about the situation as no one will be expecting you to be looking your best two weeks after birth so dont be too hard on yourself about all that.
Moet for me Posts: 1841
I was at a wedding 2 weeks after dd birth and dh's ex was bridemaid >:o) >:o) . It is hard to get organised I couldn't find anything to wear as I was still massive (still am 2 years later but that is another story) What about getting one of those wrap around dresses that could be very forgiving for a new mum which would be nice. I tried to breast feed but unfortunately it didn't work out so I'm not much use there. the one thing I will say is that the baby was a gret decoy nobody was interested in me thank God. I have one last piece of advice get your tan done professionally I streaked mine all over and in the end I had to wear a random pair of trousers that happened to fit. It all went well though I think the post baby high carried me through.
grumpy Posts: 1280
I think everyone has pretty much covered everything, but I just wanted to add that babies are actually a lot easier to bring away at that age than later on! As a newborn, your babs will sleep a LOT, making things so much easier on you. As for "accidents" with breast feeding, as bibikay said, pads will sort that out. Something that I didn't know beforehand was that it takes up to 6 weeks for your boobs to settle into breastfeeding, and up till then you will be heavy and engorged and leaking a lot :eek. You could be lucky and not have those problems though! As for comments on the size of your friends, thats just disgusting. You just keep in mind that their issues about size are [i:q3brum14]their[/i:q3brum14] issues, not yours, and once you're happy, you'll be gorgeous no matter what!
Mrs Lucy06 Posts: 929
Hey just wanted to reply at my wedding last year my best friend gave birth 3 weeks before the wedding, she was due exactly 10 days before so she went early, just waited to the week of my wedding and got a dress!!! My sister also went 6 weeks early had her little girl 9 days before my wedding so the dress she was meant to wear was far to big, ended up going and gettting a dress 2 days before the wedding!!! Lucy