harrassed in work

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letty Posts: 444
hi guys a bit of a long story but here goes just wondering has anyone been harrased in work, im really upset over this, there is a guy in my job and he is one of the managers, but not my boss, he thinks the world revolves around him, a few years ago when his wife went off with someone else, he went anti women, and talked to us women like crap - so i stood up to him,, etc,,, anyways after that i just thought he was a lazy bollo* so i never did anything for him but another girl did,, when my boss isnt around, he likes to question everything i do, or if i take time off he questions everything and talks about me to the other girl, she tells me and i feel so upset, i had to go to a conference a few weeks ago when my boss was away and i got the third degree off him (was it important) why am i goin etc.... i rushed back after conference coz of his drama - and i got the smart reply - umm will you be here for the rest of day - or will you be goin off again,,, well i wanted to plant him,,, i was bulling i so wanted to go to the md, but i didnt,, now this week i had to go to work sat (overtime) i lasted 2 1/2 hrs and was feeling really weak and i was getting sick so i asked someone was it ok if i went home, he said yeh grand, i got the third degree off this guy when i came in today, smart question where you only sick in here on sat or all weekend and his slimey smile - i knew what he was getting at,,, can he not see im 28 weeks pregnant and i feel sick most mornings,,, but yet he still has to question it, if he was really concerned i would understand but he doesnt give a so tempted to barge into the md's office and do what i dont boss is away...and im on my own and i just feel like crying.... sorry for the aul moan,,,,,,
stinky Posts: 606
In my experience these things are best dealt with yourself. Get a thick skin and answer back to his comments. If you go to MD you will start a formal harrassment complaint. These are really messy and from my experience his seniority will go in his favour unless there are other complaints. If you handle him properly he will soon realise he can't keep treating you like this. You need to make a joke out of his constant questioning etc - something along the lines of 'you'd swear you didn't trust me or you'd swear you were my boss' I don't mean to sound unsympathetic at all - I do think he is in the wrong but some companies view the front line staff as disensable whereas managers aren't. Be careful - you don't want to come back from Maternity leave to be told you are on letter opening duty because they think you are a trouble maker. Hang on in there and try not to let him get to you too much
letty Posts: 444
thanks stinky the thing is ive done that for so long,,, now i nearly puke when he talks to me, everyone hates him and has problems with him,, and the md's Hate him they just cant get rid of him coz he is here 20 odd years...... he is just horrible,,, will rise above it though - thanks for the reply i just needed to hear something before my h2b comes in and gives him a right hook........ its amazing coz customers and suppliers and staff - hate this man with a passion,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
stinky Posts: 606
I know. I work for a big company and there are loads of ar*eholes in here that everyone hates but they can't get rid of. I hate dealing with them but I've gotten into trouble before for reporting them - something along the lines of 'Not everyone can live up to your high standard' and 'don't take your frustration out on others' This has made me cautious but I have to say it is so annoying having to work with someone like that - there is this one guy who keeps saying 'I just don't understand why you are doing XYZ' it's nothing to do with him not understanding me - he doesn't want me to do it that way but isn't my boss so can't tell me what to do. Next time he does it I'm going to ask him does he want to go on a course so he does understand! Sorry for the rant - I will behave myself now. First day of the diet and all that so I am a little aggressive :lol:
Lorr06 Posts: 214
Why not keep a diary of dates and times and what he says to u or way her looks/makes u feel...them at heast u will have summit to back u up if u do go to the MD. As u say tho, MD hates him so ur report of him mite have reason to give him a warning...worth thinking about!
mad woman Posts: 22106
yeah I'd go with lor06 there, keep a diary of EVERYTHING no matter how trivial its seems to you, maybe get your DH/H2b to collect you from work some day and walk into the office and give your man a big dirty look! he sounds like a bully to me, who can pick on vunerable, hormonal! pregnant women, you dont need this shit from such a plonker, who the hell does he think he is! >:o(
strawberry shortcake Posts: 9094
yep i agree with the girls about the diary date and write down everything he says and does
Christmas B Posts: 6191
Personnally I think you need to confront this man face to face. Don't get into an arguement. Just plain as day tell him to get off your back. Be calm when saying it!! You far from need this sort of crap when you're pregnant!! Nip it in the bud today!! If he has a problem and makes it worse after you've spokent to him then I would go to your MD. Good idea of keeping the diary too but don't delay it any longer. Confront the wanker today!! Just politely pull him aside and tell him to stop!!
boobies Posts: 1625
[quote:366xdhll]he is one of the managers, but not my boss,[/quote:366xdhll] He is not your boss so you don't have to put up with his crap!! If he says anything to you again remind him of this...... tell him you would prefer if he did'nt interfer (sp?) with your work again Best of luck let us know how you get on
letty Posts: 444
thanks girls i was really upset yesterday, and just didnt need his snide remarks you swear i had a manky hangover on sat, so my boss came back today and i told him - he is going to have a word with him, because i get no where with this man, he is so arrogant, no wonder his wife went off with some one else, who would listen to a male shovo pig, he is always right and never makes mistakes - i love to high light his mistakes when he does them and make it so obvious this morning he wanted something done - coz he thinks the computers will bite his fingers off if he went anywhere near it, i told him what to do, and that i wasnt showing him again, with gritted teeth, i told my boss he is a lazy bo**ox and that he has to learn to do things himself as the other girl cant do everything for him when i go on maternity leave, this man has got away with tooo much, with all the staff, i know he is going to say to my boss - oh i was just concerned on sat,, my arse he was,,,,,, and thats exactly what i told my boss.........the place would be a joy for everyone if this man just pi**ed off...... thanks girls for replies xxx