later that same week I found out I was pregnant
since then I've been looking for a new job I've had a few interviews but some complications mean it'll prob be another week before I hear anything... MIL is also being a complete cow
and thanks to the girls on here I made hubby talk to her about it... I thought that's that everything is about as sorted as I can have it right now but since the middle of last week I've been feeling really down, I've been crying a lot more than is normal surely, I spent over an hour crying the other day and I feel like everything is getting in on me and I just don't know what to do, I had a chat with hubby and wit mam but they both put it down to hormones. But i have this intense sadness inside me & it overwhelms me to the point where I feel like I can't breathe then 10 seconds later I'm ok but still have this heavy feeling inside me. I'm delighted to be pregnant so I don't think its about the baby but I just don't know what else it could be. I don't want to get out of bed at all and the thoughts of talking to people is terrifing me. Has anyone else experienced anything like this at all? or does anyone have any advice
ok well as some of you prob know I haven't had a great run of things lately I walked out of my job cos I just couldn't take it anymore
I read your post and couldn’t close out without replying. You really are going through a tough time of things at the moment, without even having pregnancy to deal with. I was extremely emotional for the first and second trimester of this pregnancy so understand where you are coming from, there were times when I cried that I really sobbed my heart out and it could have gone on for an hour no problem. They say that you get emotional for the first few weeks and then the laughter etc kicks in, but it took a long time for me. I had a few personal problems to deal with at the time as well so really think that took its toll on me. Talking to people is a good idea, but what I would recommend is a little time out, even just an overnight thing. Do you have a close friend you could go off overnight with, or your DH? Just go away forget everything that is happening around you and enjoy your night, spoil yourself. It is amazing how something so small can cheer you up a bit, but most of all remember that if you need to talk we are all here and will do what we can for you.
I hope I have helped in some little way.
Take care of yourself
thanks for replying IB, still feeling very low, just don't know what to be doing with myself really.... was looking over on magicmum and a few girls over there have experienced same feelings but I don't want to harm my baby taking anti depressants... I feel totally lost and I don't know how to explain it properly
I totally understand hon. When i was v emotional my DH told me he thought i was depressed and wanted me to go to the doc but i refused, and was hurt that i felt he was trying to push it on me. I didnt want to go down that route either. What i really needed more than anything was support, sometimes i wanted to talk and cry, other times i just needed to forget everything and enjoy myself. Once i explained this to my DH he understood and did then help me through it, though it did take him a while to read me and understand what was happening in my head. Can you talk to DH some more about it all?
Ps: Make sure you're getting enough fresh air - I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders last week just by going for a short walk.
Hey due date twin,
I hope it will help you to know that I'm in a very similar place. All last week I thought I was clinically depressed I felt so low. All I wanted to do was cry and stay in bed.
I think a LOT of this is hormonal but there is also other stuff too - you have a lot going on right now and you would probably feel down even if you weren't pregnant but the hormones are making things much worse. I really thought I was turning into a "crazy lady" myself last week.
Am feeling calmer now and I think these hormonal surges will come and go for us, esp during the first 12 weeks.
Would you consider going for a couple of sessions (one or two) of counselling to get you back on your feet? I'm thinking of doing that - it would be great for you to talk to someone whose first response won't be "it's all just your hormones".
Otherwise, all I can say is I think this will pass - I think the fog of hormones will lift and you will start to see things more clearly and see what really has to be done. Keep talking to us here and try to find someone "in the real world" to talk to who won't put it all down to hormones. And be good and gentle to yourself.
Crazy Lady, I couldn't believe it when I read your post as I was just about to post myself about how depressed I've been feeling over the last few days. I spent Saturday evening crying because I felt so down in myself. Went through a very bad stage of this before my Wedding because of all the stress and pressure surrounding it and I really don't want to return to that horrible dark place.
I'm feeling really down this morning. I've just so tired of work for a long time now, doing the same ol' same ol'.
Anyway, Crazy Lady, I'm so sorry if I've made this post about me as that's not what I wanted to do but what I did want to say is that I really know how you feel. I'm also absolutely thrilled that we have a lovely baby coming, but I really just can't understand why I'm feeling so down in myself.
Black Cat, I'm so sorry to hear that you've been feeling this way as well. It really is an awful thing to be going through. Hopefully you're right in what you say, that the hormones will lift soon.
It is just so horrible but please believe me when I say this, you're not alone in it.
I know this is very easy for me to say, but Black Cat is right, it will pass hon, i promise. Pregnancy is not an easy thing to go through for some people, and you have so much going on at the moment that things are so tough on you. Try talk it out with someone, someone who, like Black Cat says, wont just blame it on the hormones, but will listen to you.
I have to say MM is really great for getting advice, but WOL is where everyone is so much more friendly and will be here for you without question. If you need anything hon, we are here, or PM me.
I'm just 18 weeks gone and feel the exact same way! I did go throught he odd patch of downness at the beginning but nothing like this - its like the worst PMT ever! Don't want to talk to anyone - sick of friends, family and especially work. Fed up with peopke slagging me about pregnancy and especaiily students. I now have a trolly like bag as can't carry anything and one of the kids mad the BIG mistake of slagging me about it this morning - usually I have no problem taking this and can give a good as I get but this morning I ate her - in front of a lot of people - the poor thing nearly dies she really didn't mean anything by it! And then I had to cry!
BUT - i'm not going through half of what you are. You've had such a hard time of it lately and it's completely understanable that you might be feeling depressed - pregnanat or not! Looking for a job is the pits - its a seemingly never ending task that at times can be extrememly trying. And I even had my MIL over for the weekend and although she drove me made "helping" l ike emptying the washing maching and asking me what to do with these (I really hate that as I usually have stuff hidden in there from quick tidy!) I kpet thinking atleast she's not leaving me notes telling what i should be doing!! DH tends to resort back to being a teenager though when she's there -drives me insane and lead to major row.
The point I'm trying to make (I know I'm draging it out) is please please give yourself a break and saty in bed if you want, cry and scream if you want and realise that your going througha horrible time and there will be change ahead of you that will gopefullly make you feel a hell of alot better. i think your doing great to even keep going with the job search and everything else. And the gilrs are right - I honestly think these hormones make it all worse. Especially in the ealry satges when you can't even really tell anyone.
Chin up Crazy laddy and rem we're here to listen to everything..
, I'll prob never be able to tell you how much it means to me
Thank you all so so much for replying, just knowing that I'm not the only one feeling this way lifts a huge amount of it off me... I felt like the most ungrateful cow in the world cos I was feeling like this after being blessed with my baby so quickly.
Blackcat its great to know we're going thru the same things and its great to hear from other ppl who are feeling this way too, it makes me feel more normal if that makes any sense.
I think sometimes its very hard to even acknowledge these feelings as everyone expets you to be happy about being pregnant and obviously I am but unfortunately it doesn't stop me feeling down about everything.
Another good piece of advice was to get out (i cant remember who said it) I've been couped up in the house nearly all the time so I'm going to go for a gentle walk with my dog just to get out and stop looking at teh same four walls all the time.
I'm not saying this post has cured me, far from it but at least I don't feel like I'm alone in my feelings anymore
No problem at all hon, and you are not alone, we are all here for you if anything.