How do u know when ur ready?

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boobies Posts: 1625
I've been thinking about babies alot over the past week, I mean we are only married a few months and I was totally against starting a family for a year or so but lately its all I can think about! It scared the hell out of me that I would never sleep again and would be worrying constantly. I mean we would'nt be totally financially secure, well we are fine but I surpose what I want to know is do people wait until they can really afford a baby or just go ahead with it and make do.
feelsobad Posts: 693
Hi B I think it depends on lots of things. To be honest I have been really wanting to try since we were married but hubbie wasn't ready so we decided to wait and started last month - for me it is just something I want more than anything and that out weighs any of the worries we would have. I think it depends on your age too - sometimes you need to take into account what age you are and how long it may take. I think the best thing is to chat about it to hubby - don't rush anything and maybe see what happens??
boobies Posts: 1625
Thanks Chloe, We have spoken about it and if it was down to hubby we would probably have 5 kids by now! He says he would love them but that he will wait until I'm fully sure
summer days Posts: 112
In our case we are not financially secure at all.. we are doing ok but that's about it. To be totally honest the desire to have the baby outweighed the feelings of financial ruin and we couldn't be happier. I don't think there will ever be a perfect time to have kids, but there will be a suitable time..
pretty bird Posts: 11
I really think you are ready. I would go for it. If you have been thinking about it for the last week, and you are still sure, then it is time.
Hepburn Posts: 4081
I would say don't let money be the only thing stopping you...if it is, go for it. There will never be an absolutely perfect time to do it. There will always be something you feel isn't in place, so just take a leap of faith. We were extremely secure financially when trying for our son. Now we are trying for number two we have nowhere near that level of security, but we are not letting that stop us.
MrsHawaii05 Posts: 488
if i could have turned teh clock back i wouldve: * made sure i had a permanent job with great maternity benefits/option to go part time /ok about parental leave * deffo wouldve saved more in the 9 months * had loads of extra lie ons. thats about it, as long as u have one big last holiday together like we did and are satisfied youve travelled , seen a few places imo as long as youve got your work situation sorted out and have a something saved then go for it, highly reccomended :D
boobies Posts: 1625
Ah thanks guys! We have a holiday coming up soon so going to make the best of that one and give it a go... thanks again for all your replies!
Marriedwoman Posts: 60
I agree with Pretty Bride. If you've been dwelling on it for over a week it's obviously something that you really want so why wait. Go for it.
deisebabe Posts: 740
I know how you feel. i would love a baby,i see how good the BF is with his 2 kids and know he is a great dad.we have planned on trying from early next year but lately i have been worried am i ready,am i too young,will it affect our relationship,how will his 3 yr old react,will i regret not bein able to go out etc,can we afford it. BF is butting absolutely no pressure on me but i know he is mad to try. as i said i would love to have his baby but cant stop thinkin of the negatives.