HUGE PROBLEM RE BIRDEMAID HELP!!! - Page 2

I cannot understand people who cause this kind of trouble coming up to a wedding. If i was a bridesmaid i would never ever want to cause hassle like that...id get the money together somehow! Its just an attention grabbing thing she needs to get over herself.

[quote="Niamhlily":t09676z2]My head and heart are sore from this! [/quote:t09676z2] Why won't she stay in the lodge with the rest of your inlaws? She sounds like a spoilt brat. Let your h2b look after this issue, you have more important things to be worrying over other than a childish temper tantrum.

Ignore, ignore, ignore... i don't really get why she is annoyed at this. She's being extremely childish. She should know you've got more important things to be worrying about.

To be honest she's probably heard that loads of bridesmaids get their accomodation paid for and has gone out and spent the money she would have spent on the hotel... It's her own fault though and she should have checked this sooner - if she's so strapped for cash it would've given her time to save. I really don't understand what her issue is with staying in the lodge with the others - surely it'd be a bit of fun anyway?! I'd say your H2B needs to talk to her and explain that even though some couples pay for the bridal party's accomodation you really can't afford it and suggest some cheap bnbs or mention again that she could stay in the lodge for free. Sounds like she was really just planning on a nice weekend away in a swanky hotel at your expense...

We are not getting married for another 3 and half months, surely she could come up with €120 in that time...... We discussed accommodation before and i said that the lodges were a great idea for everyone staying for a few days and that it work out cheaper and they are fab!! not once did she mention that she expected us to pay and i didn't offer!!!!! I have checked with all my married friends and none of them paid of their BMS and i have been BM and i would never expect bride and groom to pay!!

[quote="Niamhlily":15hmq8x2]We are not getting married for another 3 and half months, surely she could come up with €120 in that time...... We discussed accommodation before and i said that the lodges were a great idea for everyone staying for a few days and that it work out cheaper and they are fab!! not once did she mention that she expected us to pay and i didn't offer!!!!! I have checked with all my married friends and none of them paid of their BMS and i have been BM and i would never expect bride and groom to pay!![/quote:15hmq8x2] Three months gives her plenty of time to save. She'll just have to sacrifice going out for a few weekends and lay off the shopping. If she has money for these things then she can certainly afford to pay for a room in a b&b or the hotel.

[quote="Niamhlily":zqqj72ft]Her parents, brothers and the other BM are hiring a lodge on the grounds of the hotel thats sleeps 6 and there is a FREE bed there for her....but she wants a double room in hotel... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh[/quote:zqqj72ft] now thats been a beeatch id get her mam and your h2b to sort it out ,that way your left out of it ,im sure her mam will put her in her place

Tell her you would still love for her to be bridesmaid so you are not changing your mind and would hope that she doesn't change hers. If she feels she can't stay over on the day of your wedding you are so disappointed but at the same time you understand her financial situation. Mention something about the wedding certainly not being cheap. That's all you can do really. edit - I should say that it's not your responsibility to look for accomodation for her and you've done all you can. Take a step back and just get on with planning the wedding yourself.

Ah she sounds a madame and a half. I would leave it in the capable hands of your H2B to speak reason to her. Sure everyone will probably be that drunk by that stage they wont really care were they stay. I just dont understand why she wont stay in the lodge with the rest of her family. Very few brides and grooms pay for the bridal party accommodation nowadays.

It's amazing how awkward some people can be, especially family. I know it’s easier said than done but try to not let it affect you. If she doesn’t want to be bridesmaid there isn’t any need to ask someone else to replace her. I’m having 3 bridesmaids and 4 groomsmen as 1 of my bridesmaids (my sister and maid of honour) is due with twins around the time of the wedding. I don’t think most people will notice or be bothered if you don’t have even numbers of bridesmaids and groomsmen. Doesn’t sound like she’ll be much loss anyway!