Letting go

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sunnyside Posts: 3164
Girls I've become an obsessed mother- already. Just about 8 weeks on and I can hardly let DS out of my sight. I'm embarrassed to say that I even struggle leaving him with DH. My DH is so good with him. Brilliant in fact but when he insists I go to bed early these days to get some rest I have to practically cross my legs to stop me going back downstairs. If i hear DS cry it breaks my heart. He's not really a crier but seems to cry a little bit more with DH (probably my imagination) and I hate it. How can I toughen up?? I know DS is perfectly safe and DH is starting to feel a bit annoyed that I'm so attached to DS. He's not jealous at all of me and DS but I come across as if I don't trust him with DS and I feel bad:-8 Anyone else feel like this?
naughtybutnice Posts: 1858
think it's just a natural instinct-I still feel the same sometimes. It is a case of just trying to relax-easier said than done I know. Let your DH do things his way which may not necessarily be your way but definitely not the wrong way either. I found I appreciated the time more if I was doing something for me-haircut, massage even just a simple walk. Missed DS to bits but it does get easier(not that I'm out gallivanting all the time) even though DH not jealous they do like their alone time with son too.
Babs Aug08 Posts: 828
yip can def relate! even when i cudnt think with tiredness, i cudnt leave ds once i knew he was up. u wil relax a bit more over time... good idea above - go out for 30/60 mins shopping etc and leave dh with LO - u have to start sometime
Sphynx Posts: 6795
If DH is in charge, try to leave the house. I used to find it difficult not to try to "oversee" everything DH did becaue I thought he wouldn't do it right and we'd all end up upset. I found I really benefitted from the break when I got out of the house, even if it was only for a walk down to the local coffee shop and back. He's only very young so I think it's perfectly normal to feel like that. I remember nearly having heart failure when DH and his mum took DS out for a walk "around the block" and didn't come back for over an hour when he was only 3 weeks old. I was so upset about it but afterwards I realized how daft it was - he was with his father and grandmother after all and I should have enjoyed the hour off. Believe me, the older he gets the more you will treaure any half hour you get to yourself - and the less chance you will get to have it if people (DH or your mum for example) think you don't want it! So try to make a habit of it even just an hour once a week even if you have to push yourself a little! It will get easier.
little mrs sunshine Posts: 5523
Sunnyside, it is hard and to be honest I am like that still with DD and she's 9 months. I think it's cos I have been with her constantly, have never left her overnight, most I have left her is about 5hours. I think I now need to hand over more to DH (he doesn't know yet) what with a new arrival on the way. Think i'll start tomorrow, have GP checkup and might head into town for couple of hours after
Sleep Monster Posts: 2829
Ugh, I can totally relate. I wouldn't have understood it before LO arrived, but after he did I couldn't be away from him for a second! I felt so anxious when he wasn't right beside me. At 10 months I still don't want to be away from him at all really, but the anxiety isn't like it was. Your LO is still so young, you'll get used to it.