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Glittergal Posts: 1504
My dad and his family are considering putting my gran into a home as she has dimentia and cant live alone anymore. My dad lives beside her and has been caring for her along with my mother for the last year. She is gone really bad now and they are getting no help from any of his brothers and sisters apart from one who lives in Dublin and comes down as much as he can. Hes brilliant. But he has another brother who lives on the other side of my gran and does sweet FA she might be lucky if he pops in for 10 mins a week Anyway they cant really cope anymore as they both work and she cannot be left on her own anymore at any time. They have looked into nursing homes but its breaking my dads heart but he has kind of come to terms with it as she has basically lost all memory now but it is still killing him Last week was the first time I have ever seen my dad cry apart from when my grandad died. I suggested a live in carer but I cant find any information on how you go about it. Does anybody know anything about where I could get this. The family home is in the back end of nowhere so I cant really see anyone willing to do it but its worth a shot. The nursing home is costing €700 per week basic does anyone know what a live in carer would cost. Any help would be greatly appreciated
Peaseblossom Posts: 6642
well have you contacted the public health nurse because you should be entitled to someone coming in to help during the week for healthboard also could be entitled to meals on wheels if they are in your area but i would contact phn and community welfare officer to enquire about entitlements hope this helps you could advertise for someone with experience in this area as live in carer
SpringBride Posts: 406
Glittergal try the Carers Assos of Ireland, my mam is a carer for my dad and this assoc has been a great help, even if they can't help they'll put you in the right direction, my mam was put in touch with them through Beaumount Hospital at the time, also try the family dr.
Dancing Queen Posts: 2591
I don't really have any advice but didn't want to read and not reply.. I agree that your community welfare officer should have some info to point you in the right direction.I think its a disgrace the way the elderly people in this country are looked after,when most of them have paid a stamp all their lives.
Dancing Queen Posts: 2591
I meant that there are not many care home places and that they are so expensive. Don't want to be taken up wrong. My granny was very ill last year and you really get your eyes opened.
Glittergal Posts: 1504
Thanks guys my mother is her official carer at the moment. I will look into the options suggested. They called a meeting last night and basically decided on a nursing home but wouldnt you know it my aunts and uncles in Dub wanted to put in her one that would take my dad an hour to get to each evening cos its public, my dad wants a private one half and hour away from us. All they have to do is pay €25 per week each. He has 4 bros and sisters and 2 are complaining about this, the 2 that have the most money wouldnt you believe. I am so sick of the way they treat their mother and my father. One of them came down over Xmas and I wouldnt speak to her I was hopping my mad but I was told if I opened my mouth to give her what for my dad would get upset so I had to leave it. He doesnt like any trouble O:| >:o( O:| >:o( O:| >:o( It really is bad between them all when all they look out for is themselves. My dad and his uncle in Dub (Nice one) have joint control over her money and they cant tell the others cos if they did they would be looking to get their claws into it. My aunt took her up on Xmas evening and landed her back down Stephens morning stating she couldnt cope OMG my dad and mam cope every day of the week they are so selfish. Sorry had to get that off my chest swayed a bit there off the point
Bubski Posts: 1785
[quote="Glittergal":2e8g1dtf] All they have to do is pay €25 per week each. He has 4 bros and sisters and 2 are complaining about this, the 2 that have the most money wouldnt you believe. I am so sick of the way they treat their mother and my father. [/quote:2e8g1dtf] Thats terrible on them, €25 a wk is not much at all - God how many years did your gran look after them. Do they not think that they will get old too Fair play to your parents, its not easy but at least they have a heart. Good luck with it all hope it all works out
Glittergal Posts: 1504
I know they are so hard hearted its unbelievable. My gran is in a home nearby at the mo for 1 week to give my parents a break and would you believe this is the only time they come down and see her when they are not expected to do anything for her. My mam washes her everyday and when one of my aunts came down a few months ago for the week she never did it once my mother couldnt believe it. My gran knows my family but when they come down she comes up to ask us who the people in her house are. Its heartbreaking but its their own fault she doesnt remember them now as she never seen much of them over the last couple of years.
curliwurli Posts: 3369
hi glittergal, my dad is a community welfare officer, i will see if he has any information for you xx
Glittergal Posts: 1504
Thanks a mil that would be great