Major fall out....

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Bright Star Posts: 756
O girls, Yesturday was a complete diaster had a serious falling out with MIL to be. Herself and her husband (my FIL 2 b) had a full blown discussion about me in their kitchen yesturday morn ( not nice comments)..unaware that i was in the next room (and heard everything) It really broke me in half. I have been going out with mt H2b for 8 yrs!!And have always had a good relationship with his parents..they have been very good to me. But on hearing what i heard yest im gutted. My opinion of them has been completly shattered and what i thought they thought of me has gone right of the window. Anyway on hearing this i walked into kitchen (not a word said) they were in SHOCK!!! (to see i was there and knew i had heard everything)..they didnt say a word..i walked out and didnt look back. Explained all this to h 2b and he is very upset over it now..on going home last night he said his mam was crying over it all day that they didnt mean it....now he wants me to call to see her tonight!!! I said i wont but he's very upset am i wrong??? I think she is only sorry cos she was heard not because she didnt mean it!!! I refuse to go back into the house but im thinking now maybe i should for h2b sake...its 6 weeks to our wedding and this is a really blow..im so sad & depressed over this.Am i being selfish or am i right..so sorry about this rant but had to get it off my chest some way thanks :wv
25/07/09 Posts: 472
That's terrible...don't know what to say. Maybe you would be better off going to see them for the sake of yourself and your h2b's relationsship?
al4 Posts: 161
I don;t know whether this is the right attitude, but I would expect her to visit me to apologise, not the other way round. I think you will have to talk to her about it for h2b's sake but she should make the gesture to visit you , its the least she could do. you poor thing, she sounds like a weapon.
dreams Posts: 253
I think if it were me I would be very stubborn and not want to see them at all......... in saying that, your wedding is in 6 weeks and the last thing you want is an 'atmosphere' at it so I'd bite the bullet and go see them tonight and sort it out before it turns into something bigger. Good luck :xxx
Kop Mama Posts: 804
You are totally right in my opinion. Let her come to you if she is really that sorry. This is the last thing you need this near your big day? Dont feel guilty over h2b as its his parents fault this has happened. What kind of things were they saying? Feel free to tell me to mind my own business. you poor thing try not let it upset you too much hun :action32
Mrs Mia Wallace Posts: 869
Oh you poor thing :action32 Such a horrible thing to over hear people saying things about you. I don't really know what I'd do here. My optomistic side is thinking maybe you just caught her on a bad day and perhaps she didn't mean what she was saying at all. Maybe she was just having a rant and letting off some steam. We can all get under each others skins at times and we have a bit of a rant to get it out of our systems but it doesn't mean that what we're saying at that particular time is really what we think. I really hope you get it sorted for the sake of H2B and a wedding that I'm guessing you've been planning for a long time!
Anonymous Posts: 24542
Aw pet - you poor thing - I too have had a big row with my fellas family and it is horrible - I know exactly how sad, upset and disappointed you feel but can I please tell you to try and listen to your MIL and FIL and see what they have to say for themselves - it's been 3 months since my fall out and we still have not sorted anything out and it still kills me every now and then and I end up in tears over it - 3 MONTHS LATER - you'd think I'd have succeeded in giving them the kiss off by now :o0 (me big sensitive saddo - I know). With your wedding so close I know that you would prefer to have everyone on better terms on ur wedding day - think of photos and dances. Maybe get your H2B to invite his parents over to your house not theirs and have him there with you and just let them talk and see how you feel then. You don't have to forgive and forget but you can give them the chance to hold their hands up and try to fix it so that in time you guys will be ok again - not best buddies - but OK Best of luck xox :lvs
blissful2b Posts: 1555
does kinda sound like she's only sorry cos now her son is annoyed with her. if the two of them were having a chat that they thought was private i highly doubt they said the things jokingly etc. It's absolutely horrible. I wouldn't be running after them. let them come to you.
prunella09 Posts: 395
what a horrible thing to happen. You you poor thing. They were completely in wrong and defo owe you an apology. Maybe listen to what they have to say - which doesn't mean you have to accept their opinions or their apology. if they are anyway normal I'm sure they are mortified :eek Its always better to face it before its escalates into a stand-off. Having in-laws you think you are less than perfect is better than not speaking in the run up to your wedding. You have the goods already - their son. Best of luck... Pru
emlo Posts: 1506
After 8 years of going out with your H2B you probably feel like a daughter to your MIL. I know with my family, I could have a moan to my mother about my sister and vice versa and then 5 mins later think they're the best in the world and love them to bits. We all do it. That's the beauty of family! Unfortunately you just happend to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and I know it's not nice to hear someone talk about you behind your back. We all know how involved the parents like to get with the wedding and have a say, perhaps she was just letting off steam. Of course, we don't know what was said so you can only know if this is the case. It really does sound like she's sorry though. That said, I don't think you're the one that should approach her first though. She has major sucking up to do. Good luck!
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