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summerbride2016 Posts: 14
Hey is anybody else disappointed when they get RSVP back with a no or am I just being silly?We have had a few people who we thought would of been there that have just said they're not going and haven't given a reason. What are you meant to say back thanks for letting me know or should you ask why? Others I expected because they live away and there is another local wedding the same day as us.. I know it will work out cheaper for us that our numbers are below what we budgeted for but I can't help but be disappointed..
craftyPB Posts: 2625
It's natural to be disappointed, but no, I wouldn't go asking them why - you don't need to know that! Just mark them off as a no and move on. You'll have a wonderful day regardless!
Sunshine_30 Posts: 89
Ah it is disappointing especially when you have visualised certain people being there but just try to move on. I think it would play on my mind too although when people don't give reasons it's probably because of something they can't explain, maybe money, other plans and they don't want to offend you. Have a fab day though and don't let it bother you.
MissyM67 Posts: 337
Yeah I remember feeling the same and felt very sorry for my husband coz they were mostly on his side and didn't even bother giving a reason even though we went to all of theirs. On the day itself though, I was glad coz we knew that everyone who was there, really wanted to be there, and they all said it was a brilliant wedding. We had the best day ever too :)
MrsSparkle2B Posts: 1689
Ya I agree to its really disappointing, but I would rather be given no reason then be lied to like we were for some. I'm still quite hurt & my opinions of people who I thought were friends have changed but you live & learn I guess. Your day will be wonderful don't worry with those who want to be there & celebrate with you and your partner. Enjoy every second!
notthebride Posts: 172
This is probably going to sound harsh - certainly not meant to be - but I have seen this on several sites and FB. People dont need to give you a reason - box ticked yes or no. Yes its disappointing when people can't make it but its an invitation not a summons. There are lots of reasons people cant go to weddings - nothing about not wanting to be there or those who really want to be there will - doesn't work like that. My aunt can't come to mine and I was surprised but her daughter in law is due her first baby that weekend and her mum passed away a couple of weeks ago and my aunt had promised her mother that she wouldn't be on her own. So you just never know! Put it out of your mind and enjoy your day with the guests that can come.
Smallensmall Posts: 139
It did upset me a little when people said no... especially when people didn't give a reason, but Id never ask why. It could be a personal reason, they may not be able to afford it or they just might not want to ! Either way, you wont notice on the day :-) Just thank them for letting you know, believe me, in a few weeks you wont care about the ones who declined, its the ones who wont reply you'll want to kill !!
Carriedaway Posts: 1863
definitely dont ask why, to be honest its not really your business, people could be having money troubles and cant afford to go and dont want to talk about it. you just never know. And as other people have said its just an invite people are entitled to decline. It is disappointing but just try concentrate on the people who are coming and forget the others. We declined a wedding in may because frankly we couldn't afford it, a night in a hotel , a gift, spending money and a babysitter and when we weighed it up we just couldn't justify it. we didn't give a reason just said hope you have a wonderful day and sorry we can't be there to share it.
LadyLizzie Posts: 1724
I can relate, it felt like a slap in the face getting a "No" back from people. Irrational maybe but when you're all excited about your wedding it can be a bit of a let down if something doesn't go as you planned. Don't bother asking them why, don't dwell on it & you will still have a wonderful day.
October2016bride Posts: 6
I've been getting upset about no RSVPs too. We always knew there was a risk as our friends and family are generally scattered all over the world, so wherever we had it at least two thirds of the guests would have to travel. But I've been to other weddings where almost the entire guest list has traveled a long way and there was still a good turnout. Some have really genuine excuses for not coming (pregnancies, illness etc) but others I know could have made the effort as they travel all the time and have made huge efforts for other friends so I'm a bit hurt by that. We're still waiting on a number of RSVPs (deadline is a few weeks away) but I have heard most of the responses towards the end are declines - was this the experience for anyone else?