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mrsw2 Posts: 289
sex stories >:o) Was reading KityBoos sex polll and the carpet burn story reminded me of probably the most embarassing thing that ever happened to me. I thought I'd share :eek So back when myself and Mr W were dating, I used to hang out in his house all day sun and go home sun evening on the last bus. We both lived with our parents at the time and his mam used to go to bingo every sun evening so that was our only chance to dtd. So out she goes, we were snuggled up in the duvet listening to music on the laptop. I got up to use the loo (it was downstairs) and at the time they had a back porch that you had to unlock to go out to the bathroom. In my anticipation, I never locked it behind me and went back upstairs. So as we were mid job, there was a knock on the front door which we ignored and about 10 mins later as I am on top, the bedroom door FLINGS open and a figure walked in (it was dark) OH though it was his mother and let a roar at her but suddenly there was a group of footsteps belting down the stairs. Yes girls........we were being burgled :eek So OH grabs a dressing gown and follows them into the back garden, condom a flapping while I sat in the bed in complete shock. His mam arrives home to a police man in the front room, questioning us as to why were we sitting in the dark, and didnt answer the door. He had the biggest grin on his face, he knew damn well. I wanted the ground to swallow me there and then. Luckily my MIL was completely niaeve and nothing was taken. But still, some randomer out there got a good profile look of me starkers naked. :-8 So anyone else like to shed their dignity? >:o)
Princess09 Posts: 821
[quote="mrsw2":2ihvn6om]sex stories >:o) OH grabs a dressing gown and follows them into the back garden, condom a flapping while I sat in the bed in complete shock. [/quote:2ihvn6om] Hillarious! :yelrotflmaosmilie: :yelrotflmaosmilie: :yelrotflmaosmilie: That is GAS! I couldn't top that!
Bazinga T McBinkers Posts: 4718
:o0 :o0 :o0 :o0 That has me in stitches, since you shared I will lose all dignity and shame myself by telling ye's :-8 When OH lived at home we would rarely DTD when I stayed over, but on a sunday his parents would drive down to Carlingford as his dad runs up the mountains. Usually gone about 5 hours so we took the opportunity to get down and dirty. So post-coital enjoying a cuddle, hear them pulling into the yard, they were home 2 hours earlier than usual, so we jump up and OH grabs his clothes and runs into bathroom to dispose of everything, I'm throwing on my clothes and make the bed etc switch on the tv and lie up like we were watching tv, just as they arrive in the house. 15 mins later still no sign of OH, I'm thinking its a bit weird but he must be sitting up talking to his ones in the kitchen. 20 mins later he comes into the room laughing, I says whats so funny? What took you so long? He had been searching around the bathroom as the condom had disappeared, he was freaking out when the door knocked and it was his mother with it telling him to get rid of it in case the visitors saw it - he had dropped it on the hall floor :-8 :-8 - as if that was were we had planned on keeping it there. Oh the shame :-8
Wilma Flintstone Posts: 1262
[quote="Angel Doodle":1gc93u1l] 20 mins later he comes into the room laughing, I says whats so funny? What took you so long? He had been searching around the bathroom as the condom had disappeared, he was freaking out when the door knocked and [b:1gc93u1l]it was his mother with it telling him to get rid of it in case the visitors saw it[/b:1gc93u1l] - he had dropped it on the hall floor :-8 :-8 - as if that was were we had planned on keeping it there. Oh the shame :-8[/quote:1gc93u1l] :yelrotflmaosmilie: :yelrotflmaosmilie: :yelrotflmaosmilie:
stickwoman Posts: 2394
:yelrotflmaosmilie: Girls ye have just cheered me right up!
the bees knees Posts: 755
Oh girls those stories are brilliant :yelrotflmaosmilie: :yelrotflmaosmilie: Im going to embarrass myself here too.. so here goes.....Was out one night with H2b, fairly soon after the relationship started so, you know yourself ladies, the more drink on us the more we couldnt keep our hands off each other, so being the saucy devils we were >:o) >:o) , with a wink and a nod !!!!! off down the lane at the back of the pub we went and proceeded to get down and dirty so to speak , and happy out in the throws of passion when himself gets a tap on the shoulder, my boss ( who we had met earlier in the night)was being the kind man he was holding out my fellas coat saying he left it behind him...... :duh: :duh: :duh: Lets just say my boss got a good look at my behind ( and in a very uncompromising position)and I couldnt look him straight in the face for months after.... Oh the shame!!!!!!
Bazinga T McBinkers Posts: 4718
[quote="Diamond2012":287c2eyg]Oh girls those stories are brilliant :yelrotflmaosmilie: :yelrotflmaosmilie: Im going to embarrass myself here too.. so here goes.....Was out one night with H2b, fairly soon after the relationship started so, you know yourself ladies, the more drink on us the more we couldnt keep our hands off each other, so being the saucy devils we were >:o) >:o) , with a wink and a nod !!!!! off down the lane at the back of the pub we went and proceeded to get down and dirty so to speak , and happy out in the throws of passion when himself gets a tap on the shoulder, my boss ( who we had met earlier in the night)was being the kind man he was holding out my fellas coat saying he left it behind him...... :duh: :duh: :duh: Lets just say my boss got a good look at my behind ( and in a very uncompromising position)and I couldnt look him straight in the face for months after.... Oh the shame!!!!!![/quote:287c2eyg] :-8 :-8 :-8 :-8 :o0 :o0 Reading that reminds me oh another story, we were having a romantic walk and got down to it in a field - classy chick that I am. When a dog came up and starting sniffing around us, it just wouldn't go away, even when OH chased it, it just lay there sniffin and watching - next think you could hear the owner calling it, talk about a scramble to rearrange ourselves :o0 :o0 :o0 Girls, I'm not as bad as the posts make me sound :innocent: :innocent:
stickwoman Posts: 2394
[quote="Angel Doodle":36dyxbaz]Girls, I'm not as bad as the posts make me sound :innocent: :innocent:[/quote:36dyxbaz] Me thinkith the lady doth protest too much! ;o) I can't come up with anything that's remotely as embarassing.... I'm feeling really boring all of a sudden!
Bazinga T McBinkers Posts: 4718
I have loads, but thankfully all with the OH so we get a good laugh out of it, looking back :o0 :o0 :o0 [quote="AngelButterfly":1ol8zrva] Me thinkith the lady doth protest too much! ;o) [/quote:1ol8zrva] >:o) >:o)
the bees knees Posts: 755
:o0 :o0 :yelrotflmaosmilie: :o0 :o0 Just have a mental picture of the dog sniffing round ye :yelrotflmaosmilie: Oh I have loads of these stories too and we do sometimes just have a laugh at ourselves remembering them..... youd swear to God we were at it like rabbits but one morning, ( quite recently) we were at home together after himself dropped the kids to school ( a rarity ) and anyhow things got a bit fruity out in the hallway, when the postman came along and got a right eyeful......... I knew we should have got a big old teak door and not one of those fancy fan dangled fabulously expensive nearly all glass creations :o0 :o0 Id say that postman has a lot of stories he could tell!!!!