Silly fear!!!

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Posts: 23
Hi everyone, I am a regular here but I have decided to go anon as I have family on this site also. I am getting married this year and would like to try for a baby in the future year or so. There is just one thing always on my mind.......... I am terrified of having a baby who is a bad sleeper!!! I am a very light sleeper myself and a bit OCD about all things bed time (weird I know). If I don't get a good nights sleep I am fit for nothing the next day. Since my sister had her baby who just happens to be the worst little sleeper ever this fear has got out of control for me. My sisters little fella is in her bed and has them up 3/4 times a night and he is 10 months now, I don't think he ever slept the full night. My sister is always complaining that she is tired and that its such hard work at night time, I suppose all this is just putting me off. They have never really let the baby cry it out, he was always picked up straight away. As I don't have any more experience of babies I suppose I am just asking you all if this is the norm or if there is things a mom can do to ensure your baby is a good sleeper. Now I'm not going to be unrealistic, I know the baby will need night time feeds for the first few months and I know they may get sick/teeth that will wake them up some nights, but I don't think I could handle it every night until they are a year old or more!!!! :eek I can be a bit of a worrier and maybe I am being silly with this fear but I can't help it. So can any of you help put my mind at ease???
carlie2012 Posts: 127
Hey Well my experience is different, i have a 10month old and since he was 3months old he has slept all night, while i was on ML he would go down around 11pm and up at 9am, now i am back in work so he goes down around 9.30/10pm and is up around 8, we really are blessed with him. we have only had 2/3 night where is has woken up in the last 7months. Now he was 8wks early and was in SCBU for 3weeks and they get them into a really good routine, had he been on time and not in SCBU would he be the same i dont know but myself and my husband are quite easy going, so maybe he is just like us!!!!!!!!!!! So just because your sister experience isen't great does not mean yours will wont be either, all babies are different Best of luck :babydust: :babydust: :babydust:
carlie2012 Posts: 127
Forgot to say i loooooooooooove my sleep :lvs
Posts: 23
thanks for that, you must be one of the lucky ones!! If I could order one that was a good sleeper I would be all for it :o0
randomusername Posts: 2134
Would you have a look at the Gind Ford methods? She recommends having babies in a rountine from pretty much day one to guarantee sleep. I genuinely don't know if they work or not but some people seem very enthused about her and her methods. It wouldn't be my preferred method pf parenting but I have picked some things I like from her, for example she recommends not having rocking chairs or cribs for babies. They get into an unrealistic routine of being rocked to sleep, very sweet for a newborn but rocking a 3 year old to sleep is another thing! Also she says you should put baby to sleep in their nursery during the day and feed and change them in there to get them used to the room so when they're moved in there they know the room and are not startled and afraid. I think this is sound practical advice. You can buy her books on amazon or have a look at her website for an idea. I also think that with a first baby, you just want to hold them and cuddle them all the time and we run to pick them up as soon as there is a snuffle or squirm out of them, again we're setting an unrealistic precedent for the baby and setting ourselves up for failure!! I don't like the cry it out idea but sometimes babies will whinge just because making noise is new to them so I plan to give the baby 10 - 20 seconds from the first stirring and see if they settle before going to them and as much as possible try not to pick them up and kiss the face off them at every available minute :o0 Would you consider maybe trying hypnosis about your anxiety before ttc? Not being alarmist but if you are very anxious about it you could pass this anxiety to the baby and unwittingly create the problem for yourself. I've tried hypnosis before and found it good for getting fears to take a back seat and letting me focus on the job at hand.
MomToEmandJ Posts: 1977
my DD is nearly 5 months and started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks and has had a few nights in between where she has been up with her teeth or sick, that's it. sleeps very well so far
Posts: 23
[quote="Watermelonbelly":dyjv29kp]Would you have a look at the Gind Ford methods? She recommends having babies in a rountine from pretty much day one to guarantee sleep. I genuinely don't know if they work or not but some people seem very enthused about her and her methods. It wouldn't be my preferred method pf parenting but I have picked some things I like from her, for example she recommends not having rocking chairs or cribs for babies. They get into an unrealistic routine of being rocked to sleep, very sweet for a newborn but rocking a 3 year old to sleep is another thing! Also she says you should put baby to sleep in their nursery during the day and feed and change them in there to get them used to the room so when they're moved in there they know the room and are not startled and afraid. I think this is sound practical advice. You can buy her books on amazon or have a look at her website for an idea. I also think that with a first baby, you just want to hold them and cuddle them all the time and we run to pick them up as soon as there is a snuffle or squirm out of them, again we're setting an unrealistic precedent for the baby and setting ourselves up for failure!! I don't like the cry it out idea but sometimes babies will whinge just because making noise is new to them so I plan to give the baby 10 - 20 seconds from the first stirring and see if they settle before going to them and as much as possible try not to pick them up and kiss the face off them at every available minute :o0 Would you consider maybe trying hypnosis about your anxiety before ttc? Not being alarmist but if you are very anxious about it you could pass this anxiety to the baby and unwittingly create the problem for yourself. I've tried hypnosis before and found it good for getting fears to take a back seat and letting me focus on the job at hand.[/quote:dyjv29kp] Very good post thanks for all your advice :wv
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