V.Traumatic first birth, options for 2nd birth?

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first-timer Posts: 463
Hi girls, Just have a question as i got pregnant this time determined to make sure i don't have the same problems as last time. I didnt post my birth story here as i didn't want to scare anyone!! its was v. traumatic but still hasn't put me off having more..obviously!! In short: 11lb 2oz baby, normal delivery. i was 2 weeks overdue, they scanned me at 12 days overdue and said he was around 9lb 3oz so big enough already, they never guessed 11lb 2. induction day they broke my waters and disappeared for ages, (i had had pethidine a few hours before but it just made me sleepy for a while), contractions were coming really strong and i was in so much pain and wanted an epidural, kept asking OH to go and get a midwife which he kept trying to do but they took ages to come and i was in agony, eventually they came and realised i was 6cm dialated already so they rushed me down to delivery ward. So got down there and they put me on the bed etc, i asked for an epi and they said yeh in a bit, i kept asking and asking as contractions were getting v bad and they said 'oh ok we will get anetheist now', he took so bloody long to come and i told them to get him to hurry as i could feel things progressing, they checked me and i was 9cm!!! and they said 'ah sure ur far enough now u won't need it' i insisted and by the time he came down i was feeling an urge to push and so cudnt sit still so told him to leave it and i tried pushing. after ages i wasnt getting anywhere so i called him back. again he took ages and they were telling me not to have it as its bad for baby at this stage i was in agony tho so i said 'shut up and give it to me!' so they did. anyway as baby was so big i was pushing for ages afterwards and eventually got somewhere. although babies shoulders got stuck and they were using using forceps so they gave me an episiotomy and pulled him out, despite the episiotomy i had a huge tear and lost like 3 pints of blood or something and long story short they thought i was going to need to go to theatre. thankfully they got everything under control. needed a few units of blood though as i was so weak and iron levels were so low. they also said 'oh just as well u got the epidural as that would have been very painful for u!'. omg and this was after them telling me not to get it!'. how can u have faith in hospitals when they admit afterwards that u wre right?? baby needed to get sugars tested several times a day as he was so big and sugar levels were v. low. i cudn't move out of the bed as i was in bits as u can imagine. all pride went out the window as i've lost count of the amount of people who looked at my ''special place' lol. i had to stay in an extra night and even then i had to beg for them to let me go as i just wanted to be at home. anyway sorry to scare people my question is has anyone had anything similar? and if so did they hosiptal give u anymore options on ur second baby to prevent all this drama happening againeg. c section, better weight monitoring etc?? does anyone think i qualify for an elective section this time around? keep telling myself i wont let that happen to me again. thanks girls.
SparklyB2B Posts: 1131
Hi First Timer.. Sorry to hear you had such a rough time of it.. I had a horrific time of it aswell - wont go into the gorey details as dont want to scare any 1st time mums.. but had 19hrs of labour followed by an emergancy section with massive post c section probs which resulted 10 days later in emergency surgery for an infection that was dismissed as superficial followed by contraction of MRSA & a period of time spent in isolation!! Going to a diff hospital this time round & my consultant presumed that I wanted an elective section this time round - going to try to avoid if possible but only a 70% chance of a natural birth & his really depends on what the consultant thinks after we get a copy of my records from the other hospital. So i think if you explain your concerns to your Consultant he/she may give you the choice of an elective section.
theoracle Posts: 7664
Hi FT, I understand that you had a really, really tough time first time round, BUT 2nd time birth is nothing, absolutely nothing at all like the first. Firstly, you have done it before so your body has a memory of the birth, everything will be much more flexible 2nd time round. Labour tends to be much, much shorter and provided the 2nd baby is facing the right way and is not as big you should do absolutely fine. I had over 20hrs of labour on first with forceps delivery, epidural and epio (was nearly an emergency section) - I suffered a lot during labour and in recovery, I have had heavy blood loss, but nothing like you, yet my 2nd birth was under 3 hrs, I had 0 pain relief, and I flew through it, no tears or stiches, my third birth was also all natural, no pain relief, 6.5hrs labour and 9+oz baby. Every birth is different, but the first time is def the hardest, so I wouldn't judge by that.
BB1 Posts: 752
First timer I had a similar experience but not as bad, you poor thing. I also had a big baby however this was expected and they were nearly bang on with calculations. Im expecting again and had a good chat to my consultant about the birth this time round and to be honest I feel calm, I think because they now know my history. He was telling me that most first time mums that have big babys very rarely dont need an intervention but that second time round they are not required. You'll probably be tested for gestational diabetes to rule that out and the midwives and consultants wont want you to have the same experience again so there is no way they will let you go over by 2 wks. my cons was saying to me that sweeps are very sucessful on 2nd time mums and this will be offered to me from about 38/39 wks obviously depending on how things are going. Also I lost alot of blood too and cons told me that they will put me on a drip in labour to prevent haemourging (sorry terrible spelling), so might be an idea to ask about this (apparently the blood loss is to do with big babies also and the uterus can need some help contracting back). Im really hoping to push baby out myself this time without all the drama and my cons reassured my he had high hopes this would happen, so fingers crossed. Try not too worry hun, you'll be grand.
funkyfish Posts: 7626
sorry you had such an awful time, why don't you go private/semi private and request an elective section
newmammy Posts: 115
my sister had a really horrible experience having her first baby. She went private on her second pregnancy and requested a section which she got. Some consultants will do this, others wont. she rang consultants when she got pregnant to see which would be willing to do an elective section
lmc1978 Posts: 423
hi first timer, i would be interested in other people's opinions on this too. i loved reading other people's birth stories while PG and was really looking forward to posting my own but didnt cos i didnt want to relive it at the time cos i felt like a bit of a failure after all my planning. also didnt want to scare people! now that i'm due again im also considering my options. on DS i had failed induction at 4 days overdue (was induced because of pre eclampsia) but baba was not ready to come out. waters were broken, 18 hours of labour followed and i got the 2 full doses of epidural only for it to not work so i was in agony and also it slowed things down i felt.he was too high up and wasnt coming so they eventually tried forceps and venthouse and then went for an emergency section. he was only 9lb 10oz but just too comfy in there. came out looking like we had woken him up from a sleep and he is perfect and i wouldnt change my experience because it gave me my beautiful healthy son. BUT!!!! this time around i know that i will NEVER be in the same position again. i havent decided what to do yet re:another section but i think having gone through the experience once you are so much more prepared and no matter what happens you've been there before and have that experience under your belt so you'll be so much better aware of what's going on etc. even if, worst case scenario, i had the same experience as on DS (which i doubt will happen after me taking hope from some of the posts here!) then at least i'll be better prepared. as a first time mum you just dont expect to have to have a c-section and they gloss over this in the prenatal classes too so at least you know what to expect. sorry.........am rambling now! i have my first appointment tomorrow so i'll post back and let you know what consultant says. im SP in rotunda so not sure what they will say. GP was realistic saying that i've 70% chance of VBAC but to be prepared etc. sorry for the rant! :wv
Mammypig Posts: 832
On my 2nd everything was pretty much the same as my first, waters broke first and got the epi at 7/8 cm. Tore slightly on 1st but ds got stuck on the way out and was coming so fast that i suffered 3rd degree tear and was rushed down to theatre for 2 hours. Spent 3 nights in hospital very sick and had to have physio after. My consultant has told me there is no way i'll be having a natural birth again as i'll tear straight away. Its taken me a while to come to terms witj this (bad family experience with c section), but i know he wouldn't have said it if he didn't think it was necessary
summer daisy Posts: 1336
My first labour was very tough to be honest, induced at 12 days over and in pain straight away.. begged for the epidural after 9 hours and only 3cm.. then oxytocin, vacuum and distressed delivery. DD1 had merconium in the waters and was very blue on birth with the cord wrapped around her neck. Birth took 22 hours and very stressful. I had an epistomy and was in terrible pain afterwards! Second time round, I barely made it to the hospital.. DD2 arrived an hour after we got there,no pain relief (too late!), no intervention and no tears or stitches. It was a tough hour but then it was over and DD2 was perfect. The best labour experience imaginable.. I was very distressed about the 1st labour but honestly the second was nothing like it. Here's hoping no.3 goes just as well!! SD