What is it about MIL's too!! Does anybody not get on with their FIL? Its always the mothers from what I can see!
I'm going to have a boundary around my house like a prison! Nobody is getting in!!
What is your MIL like??
Mine is completely hit and miss. Half of the time she is so so nice and would bend over backwards and other times she is an utter dragon.
I end up biting my tongue so that it doesn't kick off which is so hard to do sometimes and I end up looking at H2B wondering if he is a man or a mouse.
I cannot stand my FIL, MIL is lovely but irritating sometimes, I think its because of the age difference between them and my parents. My parents are early 50's and FIL/MIL are mid to late 60's. They are so different to my parents, they are British and sometimes I just dont get them.
There are very strong reasons for me to almost say the word hate when it comes to FIL but I wont go into them here
I am incredibly lucky with my FMIL, we have a wonderful relationship. Ours is a little different though as I've been best friends with her daughter since we were in school (which is how I ended up meeting H2B) and she was always like a second mum to me, as my mum was to my best friend. And when my parents moved to Spain when I was bout 23 she really stepped in to the mammy role for me (which my mum was delighted about cause she knew I'd have someone still watching out for me over here!) and that was before I ever fell in love with son, he'd been away to college and living away from home up until that point so I hardly knew him!
By the time he moved home and we did fall for each other, his house was my already my 'family home' over here - not that I lived there, I had my own place but ya know what I mean. It did add a little bit of pressure when I started to like him, we needed to both be sure we really felt what we did before we let anything happen cause at the end of the day if things didn't work out he'd still be stuck with me popping over every weekend!
I think it helps the whole mother in law thing that me and his mum had such a strong relationship before hand. She was over the moon for us when she heard we were together because she already knew me so well, she didn't have to worry about whether I was gonna treat him right or not or worry that I was gonna steal him away from her cause I was already a part of the family so to speak.
I'm like the son she never had and their family all know she thinks that way. I get the full mrs Doyle treatment when I'm there. She's brilliant.
I'm also in their lives over 12 years now and it will be 13.5 when I marry their daughter.
I can never understand people having some inbuilt conflict or defensiveness with their MIL. It always seem to be women who have some issue with MILs though and hardly ever men.
My mother also loves my OH and vice versa.
There definitely seems to be more conflict in the DIL / MIL relationship compared to the SIL / MIL relationship alright based on threads on here.
My FMIL is an absolute sweetheart and I love her to bits. I think we're actually quite similar which is a bit weird if you think about it to much so I avoid that but I'd say it is an advantage when it comes to my relationship with her.
You know why your similar bee?
They say that men choose mates based upon similarities to their mother/sister because they grew up with women like that so you being a similar personality to his mother is probably of no surprise.
Weird Cat Lady
Better get the brandy out, Morag.
PurpleSidhe that is a fairly unique situation, it sounds lovely! Bet your FMIL couldn't have been happier when you got engaged to her son, seeing as she knew you so well.
[quote="MrQ":bruytfn5]They say that men choose mates based upon similarities to their mother/sister because they grew up with women like that so you being a similar personality to his mother is probably of no surprise.[/quote:bruytfn5]
My OH has said on occasion that his mother & myself are the same person at times, we share the same opinions on some things. I am not quite sure how to take that, but as long as he's happy about it!
FMIL is lovely to me but she is not as keen on his brother's fiancée, who is very much viewed with suspicion. I've been on the scene longer so they know I am not gold digging (for land, they're farmers!), but the brother had a whirlwind romance with an older woman and got engaged in just under a year.
I adore mine, we get on so well and we often go out ourselves for dinners/drinks/shows/cinema.
She's great fun and a genuinely good person and I have a lot of time for her I have to say - AND for my future father in law in fact. Our wedding is in December and I'm really looking forward to joining that family. I feel very lucky!
I love both my MIL and FIL (and BIL actually). They're my family now too...so lucky. Having said that...would I go on extended holidays with them...probably not but love them all the same!