What would you do??

Hi, As some of you already know, my dad has been consistantly wrecking my and OH's head since we got engaged. Things have gotten so bad that I am not sure I want him there at all. The things he has said and done in the last 6 months are unforgiveable My problem is this..... I would love to stand up on my wedding day and make a lovely speech about my OH. But I dont feel I can stomach saying the 'thank you's' to my dad beforehand as is speech etiquette. And I just cant stand up there and launch into a speech about OH as then my dad will go mad that I ignored him. I have nothing nice to say about him, nothing to thank him for and I just cant do it. But its not fair that my OH is left out because of this. Can anyone offer any advice on how I approach it? It might not even come to this as my dad may end up not coming anyway. I dont even want the man walking me up the aisle.

Could you have non-traditional, non-speech speeches? Suppose just before the meal, your OH stands up and says 'We've decided not to have any formal speeches today, but I just want to tell my new wife.....(insert nice things about you)'. Then you stand up and do the same for him. Then tell them all to enjoy their dinner, and sit down. If your Dad sulks or goes mad, you say 'What are you talking about? There were no speeches'.

can you generalise it and thank your family as one?

Yeah I was thinking that. My OH is going to get up and thank his parents profusely as they are great. My measly 'thank you' to them will sound bad in comparison. And my family have been NO help whatsoever. They are turning up for a free dinner. Maybe I will just be so happy on the day, I will be able to stand up there and lie my head off

What about a poem??? You could write (or find) a nice gushy poem about your hubby that says all you want to say but as it wouldn't be a speech as such you wouldn't have to do any thank yous.

[quote="pigeonwife":2618lbww]What about a poem??? You could write (or find) a nice gushy poem about your hubby that says all you want to say but as it wouldn't be a speech as such you wouldn't have to do any thank yous.[/quote:2618lbww] ooooh, I like that idea. I never thought of that! Thanks!