Why am I not happier?

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naughty nuptials Posts: 517
OK, I preface this by saying that a.) it's my first pregnancy and b.) we had been TTCing for 2 years - so you'll allow me a little neurosis... I have discovered a whole new type of 2 week-wait - the wait between your BFP and your 8 week see-the-heartbeat-and-be-sure-it's-all alright scan. I have another 13 days to go till my scan and I'm going out of my mind! What if there's no heartbeat? What if it's not developing properly? And why am I not ludicrously happy, like I thought I'd be, but a bundle of nerves?? Oh, and who stole my boobs and replaced them with a couple of watermelons? Any hints on how to enjoy what should be such a happy time? Or at least something I can do to take my mind off it?? NN xxx
Hearts07 Posts: 540
Its perfectly normal to feel like that - especially until you see/hear the heartbeat. We've all been the same. You have to keep thinking positive thoughts. Unfortunately I've no advice on how to take your mind off it but try and stay positive. You've no reason to to believe something is wrong so try and think good thoughts. Best of luck in 13 days.
workingmom Posts: 3429
Naughty Nuptuals, you know what, sometimes, we have to trust in fate, everyone of us pregnant ladies has thought the same thing I am sure, for me it was wondering if the egg had implanted correctly and was not ectopic.... but really, whether you worry or not, will it change anything? que sera sera, see the best side of things and don't be driving yourself nuts waiting. The first 13 weeks take forever to pass, then it flys by. Congrats on the pregnancy, you must try to enjoy it, it will go by so quickly. *)
maisedon Posts: 1394
Hi naughtly, I was the very same as you, and to be honest a lot of women are so I'd say its normal to feel this way. Don't expect it to go away though, even if you do see you baby's heartbeat in 2 weeks time. I saw my babs little heart beat at 7wks and 6 days :lvs and while it was a lovely, amazing experience, I'm still worried. My next scan is at 14 weeks and already I'm a bundle of nerves wondering could anything have gone wrong in the meantime. To be honest, the only way that I can deal with it is to keep telling myself that its normal to worry, I'm not alone, so many other women worry too and have normal babies....and looking at family history etc, etc, the chances of anything going wrong is quite small. I know thats probably not the answer you were looking for....but I posted a similar thread about worrying constantly, and I did take some comfort from the fact that it's completely normal to worry.... *)
Jeidi Posts: 3128
I'm still at that stage and I'm almost 18 weeks... dont expect it really ever disappears really. congrats on the BFP though :o)ll You'll find when you're on your own you do all the worrying but when your in company talking about the baby you get all excited! P.S Your so lucky with the boobs, I'm still waiting patiently on mine to get huge!
sinion Posts: 6050
Firstly, congrats, that's amazing news! Secondly, it's really hard to get very excited at that early stage, you're in utter limbo as you have pretty much nothing to show for being pregnant (apart from feeling awful and the giant boobage). For me I found that I only really got excited about being pregnant when I started to feel the baby move. Up until then it was just too hard to accept, I even had a hard time believing that the scans were real, there was a voice at the back of my mind telling me that they were showing me a video of someone else's scan everytime I went for one, nuts I know but it just takes quite a lot to accept it. Trust me, it will come in time, just look after yourself for now!
chicam Posts: 1169
I was exactly the same - particularly after more than a yr TTC-ing, I found it hard to believe I could actually be pregnant. And don't forget that in the very early stages if you don't have any sickness etc it's hard to "feel" pregnant. Like the others said, when you feel babs move & hear the heartbeat it will all become very real to you :o)ll Congrats :o)ll :o)ll :o)ll
Delish Posts: 4176
Hi, Congrats, I didn't enjoy the first 12 weeks, I was tired, sick, looked like crap etc, middle three months were much better, actually was fine up until about the last 6/7 weeks. Found the end kinda hard again. What you are experiencing is totally normal.All I did was sleep, so turn into a rumplestilskin for a few weeks and then you'll be grand again!
lovebug997 Posts: 4034
Naughty nuptials, sorry to hear that you are not enjoying it as much as you feel you should! I am one of the most relaxed people I know! I don't really get stressed about anything but as this is my 1st pregnancy it's all new to me too! Unlike you we weren't ttc so the pregnancy was a total surprise! 1st thing I worried about was how to tell h2b! I knew he'd be delighted but was also thinking about the financial implications! We were only 2 months engaged, planning a wedding for next year, building a house! I found out on a Friday and it took me until Monday to tell him! Was actually crying! Couldn't even say the words, just showed him the test! Next thing I worried about was all the smoking and drinking I had been doing over the last few weeks! After that it was waiting for the hospital appointment! Thought they were going to tell me I had imagined the whole thing! Also worried that my boobs would never feel normal again! They hurt SO much for a few weeks! (Back to normal now though - only bigger! N now am afraid to let h2b near them when dtd in case they leak!!!!!!!!) Worry is a totally normal part of pregnancy and think it's just preparing us for when they're actually born! Not sure I'll ever be worry free again! Will always worry What if the doctor tells me something awful? What if they get sick in the middle of the night? Am I giving them enough to eat? Am I holding them right? Is this the right school for them? Are they doing enough out of school activities? Are they doing too many out of school activities? Am I letting them be their own person and not influencing them too much? The list of questions never ends and at some point we just have to trust that things will work out in the end! I'm sure your scan will go fine and at the end of the day keep in mind that a relaxed mammy makes a happier child!
mummytime Posts: 3149
Congratulations. That's really wonderful news. As many of the other girls said, it's so hard not to worry. The only time I'm not worrying is when I'm at a hospital app and they are telling me everything is fine. 5 mins after leaving the hospital, I start to worry again. The first scan is wonderful though so just take it day by day. Try and keep yourself busy and your mind occupied and make sure to take good care of yourself wishing you the very best for the next 9 months. mc