Worried & DH not getting it

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wildflower Posts: 303
I'm 8+1 today. My poor boobs, which have been killing me pretty much since the start are much, much less sore today and of course I'm immediately having thoughts of symptoms dropping off leading to other things (naturally I hope). DH tells me I'm being completely irrational and its all fine, and he's failing to understand my rationale - most of coming from reading about stuff online (stupid Internet) - that this can sometimes be a not so good thing. And even though I know it might be absolutely fine and a normal thing for my pregnancy, my scan is a whole 3 weeks and 2days away and I absolutely need to know that our baby is ok. I guess I just need to rant. He's refusing to engage, and actually seems quite angry with me, but I really need to talk it out.
HappyMe Posts: 727
Would you go and get an early private scan? On both pregnancies I did around 8 weeks and I was really able to relax after that. Worth every penny - dh just humoured me by going along but he agreed that it was worth it to keep me sane. Totally different for the guys as they don't feel the physical side of pregnancy so don't have the same constant reminders and worries we do I think.
xx fairy mommy xx Posts: 1833
My boobs hurt like a mother in the beginning and then after a while symptoms passed and I had nothing - no sore boobs, no morning sickness, no nothing! Perfectly normal! But of course you are hyper sensitive about everything - your hormones are raging, every little change to your body sends you into over analysis mode and sometimes the guys just don't get it!! Of course the truth is you ARE being completely irrational but hey, you're pregnant! Even now hubbie doesnt really engage in any bump adoration, doesnt really want to talk non stop about babies and the what happens whens... But dont worry they'll be here to step up to the plate when the time comes! Good luck with your pregnancy and try to enjoy it - yip the early days are hard and you want to see baba immediately but everything is fine and time absolutely flies after you get over the early obsessions! O-O
sillymammy Posts: 47
Ah that sounds like me when I was at that stage! I was going to my GP every 10 minutes thinking I had an ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, missed miscarriage, and the list goes on. I thought my oh just didn't care or understand but he told me later that he was actually sick with worry but didn't want to show it in case I got more worked up! Of course looking back I realise we were worrying about nothing but it's different when you are at that stage of pregnancy and people just don't understand or forget how it feels. I would advise getting an early pregnancy scan, I wish I had because it would have made those few weeks easier. It can seem like a very long time when you have so many worries playing on your mind. And stop looking at the internet (except wol of course)! It's evil and any kind of freak can post something they made up and they don't have a clue what they are talking about!
Marvin Mole Posts: 1076
I would recommend the early scan aswell - I had one at 8 weeks both times and it was so reassuring. I would also try and step away from the internet .. I did this from 8 weeks until 12 weeks because I was upsetting myself googling every ache and pain I had!
ReginaFalange Posts: 10290
Wildflower I agree with the other girls re the early scan. It’s worth the money if it puts your mind at rest. Remember though that symptoms can come and go from day to day so don’t be freaking out over the fact that your boobs are not as sore today as they were yesterday- just enjoy the sore boobies break! As for you DH- I’m gonna be blunt here but would you actually rather that he got really upset and panicked about the situation? Can you imagine how much worse you would feel then? He believes that everything will be ok and that’s his way of dealing with this pregnancy so you need to respect that. It’s natural for the woman to worry more than the man but I think that’s a good thing because if ye were both running about like headless chickens it would be a disaster! I had a little bleed when I was 6 weeks gone and I was hysterical (had a previous mc). DH just sat me down and told me that it was ok, that our baby was a fighter and nothing was stopping him/her being a part of our family. He was right- everything was ok and I’m glad that he calmed me down or else I would have worked myself into an awful state. Try to relax and take it easy as much as you can.
Bigsurprise Posts: 961
I think it was around that time my boobs felt less sore also - i was worrying too but had a scan booked so knew i was going to be checked. anyway had scan monday and everything spot on. Baby correct size, nice strong heartbeat. it cost €95 and worth every little penny for the peace of mind. Dont get stressed because it wont be baby or you any good.
Delphinium Posts: 3027
Firstly, step away from Dr Google and get yourself a reliable pregnancy book like What to Expect when you are expecting or Your Pregnancy Week by Week. The internet is lethal and your hormones will make you irrational as your DH says........ although I know you will want to swing for him when he says that to you! Symptoms or lack of them bear no relation to the wellbeing of the baby. Some get no symptoms like sore boobs or MS at all and go on to have healthy babies. You will be told that these symptoms should ease at week 12-14...... some women have them all the way through and this is also normal. Worrying about everything is also normal! The only symptoms that are a genuine cause of concern are bright red blood and cramping. Get yourself an early scan for your own peace of mind. And take no notice of DH. It is hard for men to relate to until they see a baby 9 months down the road and they sometimes say silly things without meaning to. Look after yourself, hon. I'm sure everything is perfect.
Mumslove Posts: 528
DH has always been so tuned out and he also thinks im being silly but pregnancy is a very daunting experience. DH has,always been the type of guy to deal with it when he has to. He does,want to be there at first appts and to know all is fine but other than that he doesnt think about it. They dont know whats its like so its hard for them to understand. When baby gets here there is no doubt your DH will be hands on and will be there for you when you need him. I have absolutely so symptoms....nada!!! So I do worry but I know when I keep myself busy im not thinking of it. It does get easier. I also recommend an early scan for peace of mind :wv
babyblaBBer Posts: 2448
i'm nearly 10 weeks and all of my symptoms have gone. my scan is late next week and only for the fact that this is my second baby, i'd be going nuts. the same thing happened the last time, so much so that i was convinced i'd imagined the whole thing and the doctor would think i was some nutjob with a phantom pregnancy!!! despite all that, there was the little bean on the scan who is now my 2 year old DS. i don't want to get an early scan for various reasons so am just going to wait til next week (have been counting down the days for 4.5 weeks now!!!) and try to settle my overactive imagination!!! this is the hardest part of the first trimester i think, just getting through all the anxiety!