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eefc
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Postby eefc » Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:36 pm

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Bride2be040812
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby Bride2be040812 » Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:45 pm

Hi Eefc,

First of all, 6 weeks to the wedding!! It came around so fast.

Can the dress maker accommodate her on the 22nd and have it done in time if it's just one more fitting? I would try that first to try and keep her happy. If not, tell her that she will either have to take the chance on the alterations being ok or get the dress to her in dublin and tell her to get them done herself.

I wouldn't worry about the shoes and clips etc. They will be so far from your mind on the day that you won't pass them a second though. I know is hard but I'd try not let it get to you.. You'll have them as your in laws forever so to keep the peace I would try to smile and nod and grit your teeth.

Deep breaths!! You'll have an amazing day.
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eefc
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby eefc » Sun Nov 18, 2012 10:51 pm

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Vanessa Shanessa Jenkins
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby Vanessa Shanessa Jenkins » Sun Nov 18, 2012 11:39 pm

Would you just say to her that that's fine if she can't come down for a fitting but her dress might not fit her very well on the day. Maybe she might realise it's in her own best interest to come down for a fitting?

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elpi
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby elpi » Sun Nov 18, 2012 11:46 pm

Normally for these threads I think people are being overly demanding of bridesmaids but you're really not! It sounds like she's angling for you to give her money for petrol.

If I was in your situation I'd probably ring her and say "Given that you can't come down until the 22nd what do you think we should do?" say nothing, don't try and fill the silence, just say nothing and see what she says. If she says that she can't afford the petrol just say again "so what do you think we should do" if she comes out and says can you pay for the petrol I'd just say sorry with all the wedding stuff to pay for I really don't have any spare money at the moment. If she still says she can't come down I'd go with the other suggestion and say that there's a risk of the dress not fitting her very well. Hopefully that'll be enough to prompt her into action.
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MrsAtobe
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby MrsAtobe » Sun Nov 18, 2012 11:47 pm

Vanessa Shanessa Jenkins wrote:Would you just say to her that that's fine if she can't come down for a fitting but her dress might not fit her very well on the day. Maybe she might realise it's in her own best interest to come down for a fitting?


+1. She sounds like a lot of hassle.

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eefc
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby eefc » Sun Nov 18, 2012 11:55 pm

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Bonnie Parker
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby Bonnie Parker » Mon Nov 19, 2012 12:05 am

How many appointments has she travelled down for? Is she from Cork? If she was recently down for a fitting why does the dressmaker need to see her again? Is that not a bit of overkill on the dressmaker's part?

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eefc
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby eefc » Mon Nov 19, 2012 12:28 am

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katiecaboom
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Re: Bridesmaid not cooperating... am I being reasonable?

Postby katiecaboom » Mon Nov 19, 2012 12:31 am

I'd go with the suggestion that if she doesn't come down you can send the dress up to Dublin for alterations, but she'll have to pay for it as you don't have any spare money and it can cost €80 or whatever. See how that goes. Stand your ground whatever she decides to do, at the end of the day she's a bridesmaid, not the fhlipping bride!

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