Last week, WeddingsOnline were delighted to assist Ciara Kenny from the Irish Times in an article on the subject of Irish Emigrants. The article Planning your Day from Far Away, written as part of the Irish Times’ Generation Emigration supplement, focused on Irish brides and/or grooms who are living abroad and plan to return to Ireland to get married.
Couples return home to get married for a variety of reasons; to wed in their family parish, to spend some time at home, or because they’ve fallen in love with a beautiful venue or landscape that can’t be found anywhere else. Mostly however, people choose to return home to ensure that most of their family and friends are present at one of their most important days of their lives.
Whatever your reason for returning home to marry, we have some great advice and tips to make sure your planning process is a smooth one.
The Paperwork
Ask anybody who has planned a wedding recently and the first thing they’ll urge you to get sorted is the paperwork. This is one of the first things you do if you are living and marrying in Ireland, but it should be prioritised for people outside Ireland to ensure everything is done correctly and on time.
The main piece of documentation you need to ensure your marriage is a legal and civil one is your Notification of Intent to Marry. You must personally notify a registrar of your intent to marry within three months of your wedding date. However, if you and your fiancé are both living outside of Ireland you can send this notification through the post. To do this you must have the prior agreement of the registrar, so call ahead and explain your circumstances.
Make an appointment well in advance (six months approximately) to meet the registrar to hand over your –
· Notification of Intent to Marry
· €150 fee
· Passports
· Birth Certificates
· PSS numbers (where appropriate)
This appointment must be attended at least five days before the wedding.
At this appointment you should also advise the registrar of –
· Your intended date of marriage
· Whether it is a civil/ religious ceremony
· The names/ DOBs of your two witnesses
· The details of your solemniser and venue
Once the registrar is happy with all documents he/ she will issue you with a Marriage Registration Form (MRF). Any marriage that takes place without a MRF cannot be civilly registered.
The MRF should be signed by the bride, groom and solemniser of the wedding and given to the registrar within one month of the wedding.
You can choose to go to any registrar in the country; it doesn’t have to be your local registrar or the registrar nearest where you are getting married. The busiest offices tend to be in big cities but if you arrange your appointment well in advance you should be fine.
See a list of registrars in Ireland
Church Ceremony
For a Catholic or Church of Ireland wedding, the priest will require a baptismal and confirmation certificate. To get these certificates you must contact the parish office of the church you were christened in and the church you were confirmed in (if different). These certs should be issued within six months of your wedding. If you are marrying in another parish you may require a Letter of Freedom from your own parish, but speak to your priest and he will advise you of the correct documentation.
If you are required by your church to do a pre-marriage course (this is often compulsory for a Catholic wedding but you can check with your priest if you have difficult circumstances) you can do one in the country you are currently living in. Some Catholic pre-marriage courses include –
Check with your priest if your proposed course is accredited and suitable.
The Planning
If you’re feeling a little anxious about planning an Irish wedding from abroad, just image what it would be like WITHOUT THE INTERNET! Planning a wedding is obviously now easier than ever with email, websites, wedding forums, and sites like Pinterest and Skype. Wedding suppliers are, like most businesses, embracing technology and it’s often more suitable for everyone to meet your suppliers through a live video link than it is over coffee even if you are in the same city as them!
To check you are arranging everything, follow WeddingsOnline’s 12 Month Wedding Checklist and tack on three months before each so that you are well prepared for all inevitabilities, of course you may want to change some times around to coincide with visits home if you are lucky enough to be able to have some!
If you are living abroad, chances are a lot of your friends are scattered across the globe too. A timely ‘save-the-date’ would ensure they will do their best to be there and chances are they’ll be delighted for the chance to get home for a week! Ten months to one year in advance would be sufficient and you can do this with physical stationery, or as an electronic save-the-date if you haven’t thought about your wedding style/ theme etc. You can save on the cost of postage by asking a family member to send your actual invites out locally.
Depending on the country you are currently living in, buying a wedding dress will be either a dream come true or completely impossible. Irish bridal shops pride themselves on customer service and it is rare that you’ll find one that doesn’t treat you to a personally tailored service. Many will be happy to make any adjustments to your dress the week before your wedding if you explain your circumstances to them.
Your hair and make-up trials can also be done the week before your wedding, or alternatively you could get your trial done by a local beautician/ stylist and take pictures to show your wedding supplier(s).
A major aspect of planning a wedding from another country is delegation. Of course nothing can compare to the services of a professional Irish wedding planner, who will take care of all the major plans, as well as all the nitty gritty stuff, and will keep you in the loop throughout. In fact, do not write off this option, as you may be surprised at how wedding planners can tailor a service to your needs and will often cost a lot less than you might have imagined!
When it comes to arranging suppliers such as bands or church singers or menu planning, you will have to put your trust in a family member or friend to attend gigs or tastings. You should ask other brides on the WeddingsOnline Forums for recommendations too!
Whatever way you decide to take on your planning from abroad, enjoy it and don’t let it intimidate you, you’ll be surprised at how many people are there to help, both close friends and perfect strangers!
Links to related WOL Forum posts:
· Newly engaged, planning a wedding in Ireland from abroad
· Registering marriage from abroad?!
· Planning an Irish wedding from Australia and Middle East
