Wedding Wednesday: First Dance Alternatives For Couples Who Don’t Like The Spotlight [Episode 96]


The First Dance is a beautiful moment where you dance together in front of your loved ones. But it’s not for everyone! 

Maybe you don’t like all eyes on you, maybe you have two left feet or maybe you just want to do something different! Check out these first dance alternatives…



Episode breakdown

What’s the point of a First Dance?

Before we share ideas, let’s talk about the purpose of a First Dance… In addition to being a special moment as a newly married couple, there are some really practical reasons for including something like a First Dance in the reception timeline. 

  • It gets guests out of their seats. 
  • It changes the tone of the night from a seated meal time and transitions into a dance time. 
  • It helps to open the dance floor.

If you were doing a First Dance, I’d be the first person to recommend getting all your guests to stand around the dance floor during this moment. It means that right after the dance, you could play some bangers and get everyone onto the dance floor right then and there!

So, with this in mind, what are some wedding first dance alternatives for couples who don’t like the spotlight?


A shorter First Dance

OK hear me out, if you’re looking to change things up but not entirely, how about doing a First Dance but with only a short amount of time that all eyes are on you. 

You could begin dancing as a couple and then within 30 seconds, get your wedding party to come out and join you.

Then soon after that, invite other couples in the room to come out too (either you wave them over, prep some couples ahead of time or get the DJ to make an announcement). 

And then fade out and straight into your bangers. 


A First Song

This is what my husband and I did!

We tried practicing a First Dance and honestly it was so awkward. Every time we made eye contact, I just started laughing and I worried I’d do the same thing on the day. 

So, this is what we did instead: we chose a song that was really special to us and we opened the dance floor by singing it for our friends and family. It was very ‘us’ because my husband is a professional musician and music producer and we love to sing together. 

We had our guests stand on the dance floor and we stood on the side and performed for them. It was an upbeat, acoustic song called ‘No matter where you are’ with lots of fun harmonies. Then right after the song, everyone clapped and cheered and our first banger came on. 


A performance

For people who aren’t super musical, you could have someone else do a special performance. Hire a band, singer, dance group, magician, comedian, mentalist or another type of fun performer. 

The key here is to have everyone around the dance floor during the performance. The performer could get your guests involved – or, if you think they wouldn’t be into that, just have someone perform and then go straight into your bangers and open the dance floor right away! 


Group photos on the dance floor

Create a moment where all eyes are on the dance floor, so you still get that special moment where everyone is nearby and ready to start dancing. 

You and your partner can sit together on chairs in the middle of the dance floor. Get your DJ to play a fun song and have your photographer ready and waiting. Have all your guests around the dance floor, standing in their table groups.

Then, with the instruction of your DJ or MC, have each group run up behind you and pose for a photo on the dance floor. 

Once the song is over, have someone collect your chairs and get your DJ or MC to announce that the dance floor is officially open!


Honour your guests

Instead of dancing, why not invite all the married couples onto the dance floor. Have your MC invite guests to stay on the dance floor if they’ve been married for longer than 1 year… Then continue dancing for a little bit, then ask guests to stay if they’ve been married for longer than 5 years… then 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, and so on until you’re left with one happy couple who have been happily married for the longest. 

You could still have all your guests around the dance floor for this moment, and instead of all eyes on you, you’ve put all eyes on a couple that inspires you! 


Play a game on the dance floor

Another way to have all eyes on the dance floor and not necessarily on you is to play a game! 

I’ve seen this amazing game where you have a group of guests come up onto the dance floor and sit on chairs – could be 10 – 20 guests, maybe one or two people from each table. 

Then have your MC give them specific things from around the room that they need to collect. Kind of like a treasure hunt. So you’d start with 20 people on the dance floor, seated. The MC would say ‘in 3 seconds, I want you to find an empty wine glass… 3, 2, 1… go’. The first 18 people to come back are still in the game. These 18 guests sit down on the dance floor again, and the MC could say something like ‘in 3 seconds, I want you to find a purse that isn’t yours… 3, 2, 1… go’. First 16 people to come back are still in the game. And you continue until there’s one person left. 

Have everyone cheer and then get the MC to say… ‘This one is for all our guests… we’re about to open the dance floor, so let’s all come out and dance, in 3, 2, 1… go!’