finding this time round really really hard

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ladybirdy Posts: 157
Hi girls I am PG with much wanted baby #2 and have a gorgeous DD who I adore. BUT I feel so crappy these days. Just really really low, depressed really. There is no logic to it we were trying for a baby and thrilled when it happened after 3 months (versus the year and treatment last time). It alls feels very surreal cos it happened quickly for us and nerve wrecking as I had an early MC first month after pill. We have both been really tentative about getting excited for fear of another MC and I therefore there has been very little excitement. Also I feel a bit overwhelmed and scared of managing two babies. Also, i really would love DD to have a sister as I have one and find myself obsessed over wanting a girl not a boy already! I am a SAHM and finding the days a bit long and lonely with nobody to talk to. We dont plan to tell family for a while so feel a bit isolated. I know I am being irrational and I know I should be happy and then I feel guilty that something will happen cos I am not being happy and positive. Guess I just wanted to say it all to someone and wondering if anyone feels or felt the same. DH is good but his job is very stressful and I am trying not to wreck his head too. I really really want to enjoy the amazing experience of being PG but as of right now I am not.
suzieblue Posts: 21
its much harder second time around, my baby is almost 12 months and im nearly 9 weeks pregnant with second. im so busy all the time not like the first time around, i was able to have a nap when i got home from work, cant do that now, im so tired at the mo but just have to keep goin, its going to be a shock to the system when no 2 arrives..the housework to so hard to do!! i do you how you feel!
kinder Posts: 504
Ladybirdy, sounds like you are so nervous after the mc that you are just more worried this time round.... I'm pg with second and it's totally different to first time around. First time was a surprise and we were so excited. This time we were trying & there is no excitment really. Don't get me wrong we are thrilled but it's not "real" yet, IYKWIM. Plus as suzieblue says you are running around after DD so you don't have the time for yourself like before. Our DD is up most nights at the moment so we are both exhausted, both at work full time so in bed most nights at 8:30! Totally differnet to last time around, where we would have been all plans, looking at books already etc etc, just don't have the energy this time! Would you tell one friend or family member and it may help you to chat about it and share their excitement at your good news... ? :xox :xox