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You made it through the planning process, had the happiest day of your life, you’re officially wed… so why the long face?
Don’t worry, it’s totally normal. It’s called post wedding blues and it happens to a lot of brides… and some grooms!
Chances are for the last year or more you ate, slept and breathed your wedding plans. You’ve put other parts of your life on hold to agonise over colour schemes, seating charts, DIY projects and wedding budgets… but what happens when all that is over with? The whole process is exciting, intoxicating, exhilarating… it’s like an addiction! Some brides like the organisation of it all, others like the artsy creativity. All we know is, once you’ve walked down that aisle, cut the cake and danced til you dropped, there are no more planning fixes – you’re going cold turkey.
Many newlyweds come back from their honeymoons with two words facing them:
What now?
It’s crazy, right? You think you’d enjoy being able to go shopping without thinking OMG those tea lights would be PERFECT for the cake table! or to watch television without ALSO flipping through wedding magazines and researching online.
There are two things going on here. One, you’ve spent so much time and energy planning your big day that when it’s over, all you can see is a big, gaping void. And two, you’re transitioning into a new phase of your life, and reality is kicking in.
So how can you combat all this?
Well, the first thing you need to remember is that this is all completely normal. You’re not alone, and you’re not a terrible person for feeling down after your wedding. Remember, marriage is a big step in your life. Although most people will say that not much changed after they got married, it’s still a big symbolic change.
Sprinkles of Love
You’re moving from one stage of your life to another, and it’s normal to feel a bit down or sad about that. Try to view your wedding as an exciting new beginning, rather than the peak event. Share your feelings with your husband, and have some quiet moments together where you can re-live your big day and discuss your hopes and dreams for the future. Maybe plan a weekend away after your honeymoon so that you have something to look forward to later on.
If you feel like there’s a void in front of you, it could be that you miss being excited about something… so why not organise a few events that you can look forward to? Maybe have your bridesmaids over to watch your wedding video, or have a New Year’s Eve party. Plan weekly or fortnightly date nights with your spouse, so that you have something lovely to look forward to all week.
Or maybe you miss being busy and always on the go. In that case, why not take up a new hobby? Or give your house a spring clean. You could take a night course, join a gym, learn to knit… the options are limitless! And don’t forget about all the thank you cards you still have to write! That’ll definitely keep you occupied for a while.
Most of all, don’t forget your friends and family. Chances are, this amazing group of people listened to your 24/7 wedding talk throughout the planning process… wouldn’t it be wonderful to catch up on non-wedding related things? Sometimes when one friend marries, the other single friends may worry they won’t see their friend as much. That only happens if you let it happen, so be sure to make time for the OTHER special people in your life not just your new husband (although you love him to bits)!
For all the newlyweds out there… did you experience any post-wedding blues? Do you have any tips and tricks for managing the blues?
