Fairy Tale wedding invitation designed by The Parlour Press Wedding Stationery
Let’s begin with the look of the invitation itself. It is true that traditional invitations are usually formal in appearance, and this calls for a formal text as well. However, times have changed and brides no longer have to be so traditional – with more unusual wedding invitation designs available nowadays, the text has become more relaxed as well. We would even go as far as suggesting that your wording no longer has to match the design of your invitation, unless this is what you actually want. For a touch of fun, you can certainly mix up some informal text (like a poem) with a traditional design you love, or write ultra-traditional text inside a really funky invitation – that little touch of surprise!
Essential invitation information
Wedding invitations should always include the following information:
- Who extends the invitation
- The event, for example wedding ceremony, wedding breakfast, evening reception
- The location
- The date and timings from/to
- RSVP info, or instructions to refer to another part of the invitation
- Whether children are invited or not
Additional information to include separately, if applicable:
- Directions to each venue plus parking info
- Gift list information
- RSVP information – as many ways to reply as possible plus ‘reply by’ date
- Accommodation info for travelling guests
- Menu and dietary requirements
- Person to contact for any questions
Who invites whom
Traditionally it was the bride’s parents who paid for a wedding, and this was reflected in the wording of the invitations, stating that “Mr & Mrs Bride’s Parents request the pleasure of your company at a marriage of…” etc etc. These days it’s still an accepted form even without the financial input, but it’s no longer strictly required. Many modern couples pay for their own weddings and they like to have the pleasure of inviting the guests themselves. This is perfectly acceptable.
What to do about family issues
It is unfortunate that some parents are divorced, no longer speaking, with other partners, or otherwise in such a situation that makes wording the invitations really awkward. There is only one way to deal with this and that is – be unsentimental and sober about it.
Let’s be blunt here – WHO extends the invitation is not the most important part of the invitation wording. The most important part are the bride and groom’s names and the where/when. So if there is any arguing among the parents on which person’s name should be at the top, cut it short by simply having nobody – make the invitation from yourself and the groom.
If the parents are happy to put their differences aside for the sake of their daughter’s happiness on her wedding day, only then you could consider having their names on the invitation. Hosting a wedding is not an automatic parental right.
There will always be scenarios where delicate family situations will have a bearing on everything from who’s invited to who’s sitting at the top table, but in the end, if they cannot be accommodated without making someone unhappy, the bride and groom would be the ones to extend the invitation.
Traditional invitation wording
Ceremony only:
request the pleasure of your company/cordially invite you to attend
at/the marriage ceremony
of their daughter
Miss The Bride
to
Mr The Groom
at ceremony venue
on date, at o’clock
Please see enclosed RSVP information
If being invited to wedding breakfast/reception, add:
at reception venue
at o’clock until o’clock
Please see enclosed RSVP information
If invited only to the evening reception:
cordially invite you to an evening celebration
in honour of the marriage
of their daughter
Miss The Bride
to
Mr The Groom
at reception venue
on date, at o’clock
Please see enclosed RSVP information
Invitation wording from the bride and groom:
request the pleasure of your company
at their marriage ceremony
to take place at
(as above)
Alternative wording:
Cordially invite you to attend
Their marriage ceremony
at (as above)
If being invited to wedding breakfast/reception, add:
at reception venue
at o’clock until o’clock
Please see enclosed RSVP information
Some guides specify that the phrase “cordially invite you to attend” is more appropriate for a ceremony invitation, while “the pleasure of your company” is more appropriate for reception invitations. Nowadays the rules are more relaxed and you can simply choose the phrase you like the most or find most appropriate.
Sample phrases for inviting/not inviting children
Inviting children is easy – just add their names to the RSVP card. If you don’t know the names, ask appropriate family members to tell you instead of asking the parents directly.
However, letting the parents know their precious darlings aren’t invited is an altogether different story. The following phrases cover several possible scenarios:
“As much as we would like to invite all the children, regretfully it is only possible to accommodate the children of close family”
“We are sorry we are unable to accommodate children at the wedding breakfast/reception”
“We respectfully request that our special day is an adult only occasion”
“Adults only celebration”
“We have arranged child‐minding facilities for the duration of the service and/or reception”
Informal wedding invitation wording
Some couples feel that the oft-used phrases like “request the honour of your company” and “cordially invite you to attend” are just a touch too formal for their particular type of celebration. There are several ways to alter these words so they are still polite and convey a sense of occasion, but are lighter in tone. Try these:
- “invite you to celebrate the wedding of…”
- “invite you to the wedding celebration of…”
- “invite you to share in the festivities…”
- “invite you to the joyful occasion of joining in marriage…”
- “would love you to join them in celebrating their wedding…”
Breaking with invitation tradition
If you feel that “hooray is our wedding day” is so much more YOU than “you are cordially invited” then by all means go for it! Phrases like “standing heart to heart“, “make an honest woman of the bride“, and even meaningful song lyrics (like Book of Love by Peter Gabriel) could just be your perfect option. Look online for unusual wedding invitation wording and you’ll see lots of examples of brides and grooms who said something personal and from the heart – and to some, that is worth more than anything else that goes in the invitation itself.
