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happy mummy Posts: 424
FoxyLockz Posts: 2448
Thats a toughie. I personally don't smoke but my sister did when she was pregnant on her 2 boys and I had no quibbles telling her what i thought but thats because she was my sister. She knew it was wrong and her excuse was ah sure its more harmful to give it up now cause you're dying for a smoke and go through withdrawl. Its down to common sense really. She should know the effects of smoking and what is does to the baby. Some people seem to think "ah it will never happen to my baby" and run the risk You can give your opinion or make a little comment but be prepared to be told to get lost....I'm sure she'll be getting comments left right and center but sometimes there is no talking to people
Smileykaz Posts: 7296
Say nothing. It is absolutely none of your business. She knows the risk, you'd want to be living under a rock not to, and she's still choosing to smoke. Unless she comes directly to you and asks for an opinion/help to stop smoking, say nothing. She's a grown woman with a husband, if she wants help to stop/opinions/a shoulder to cry on, she's well able to ask for it. Say nothing.
Anne Cordelia Shirley Posts: 4731
I don't know if saying anything will make a difference. There's only one or two smokers in my friends and both of them are well aware of the risks, are always saying how they should quit, but continue to smoke. I don't think they will ever change. My brother would also never quit, he sees nothing wrong with smoking and will continue to smoke. I think you might be causing yourself more hassle than it might be worth and nagging the woman into quitting won't work. It's an addiction, so she has to want to give it up. In saying that, I'm very strict on smokers. I don't allow smoking in my house or back garden, people have to go out into the back lane as I don't want to have to inhale any smoke. There's no exceptions to this rule, everyone goes right outside our property for a fag. With all the warnings in media and on the fecking packets, she knows well what the dangers are, and her partner too, but some people just won't quit. I hate these kind of stories but mam smoked with me (not on my siblings) and I am grand, no health issues at all.
CocoBeans Posts: 841
I’m afraid you’ll just have to keep quiet. They know it’s wrong but they care more about themselves than the baby, so I don’t know what you say that will change that??? I had a friend who smoked and then she miscarried, the doctor told her at the very time of her miscarriage how smoking increases the chances of a miscarriage. He said he could smell it on her. Only last week, she’s puffing away, telling me she thinks she’s pregnant again and will test next week. I wanted to slap her. I smoked, but I stopped before my IVF. I miss it a lot and I’d love one but I’d never do that to the baby. Your advice, won’t help, won’t be welcome and you’ll the baddie for mentioning it.
gopro Posts: 1801
unfortunately all you can do is grin and bear it , a girl in work is 14 weeks and smoking still. she says cos she is down to 3/4 a day its ok!!!! I Hate smoking. hubby is an ex smoker (thank god). I am like ACS i dont allow smoking in my house or back gareden. the smeel always follows inot the hosue. hubby has one particular cousin, who thinks its his right to smoke when and where he likes-he never gets an invite to ours also in college we studied that a smoker shouldnt be allowed hold a baby til 30mins post their that fag as the smell and toxins are still in their breath and bad for baby.
happy mummy Posts: 424
Thanks girls! [quote="yonex":272g94w2]unfortunately all you can do is grin and bear it , a girl in work is 14 weeks and smoking still. she says cos she is down to 3/4 a day its ok!!!![/quote:272g94w2] This is the exact thing my FSIL has said to me. Strange how some people can make it ok in their minds! Thanks again ladies! I feel better knowing that my decision to say nothing is for the best. I guess I know its not my place to say anything to her but I suppose I wanted other people to tell me its ok not to say anything IYKWIM!
MeSB Posts: 3785
happy mummy Posts: 424
[quote="WALLE":971ljihk]As the other girls said, it's not really your place to say anything BUT if she asks your opinion I wouldn't pretend otherwise. I used to smoke years ago and hate it now.[/quote:971ljihk] I don't see her asking my opinion unfortunately
Snuffy Posts: 1492
Totally agree with the rest, it it absolutely none of your business so say nothing. If she was silly enough to ask your opinion on it then rant at her all you like, but until that happens keep stum.